Auel Faux

2009-09-24T00:50:00.001+08:00

they know my name..

2009-09-06T06:42:00.002+08:00

If i take a life
Do you know what i'll give?
Odds are you won't like What it Is.

When the storm arrives
Would you be seen with me?
By the merciless eyes I've deceived

I've seen angels fall from blinding heights
But you yourself are nothing so divine
Just next in line

Arm yourself because no one else here will save you
The odds will betray you
And I will replace you
You can't deny the prize it may never fulfill you
It longs to kill you
Are you willing to die?
The coldest blood runs through my veins
You know my name

If you come inside
Things will not be the same
When you return to my eyes

And if you think you've won
You never saw me change
The game that we have been playing

I've seen diamonds cut through harder men
Then you yourself but if you must pretend
You may meet your end

to lose friends and alienate people.

2009-08-26T20:18:00.001+08:00

SOUNDS FUN!!

come ride with me through the veins of hystory

2009-08-11T01:59:00.002+08:00

now i know i'm losing my mind now..

if only i can get an idea on what to type...

i know

BULLSHIT!!! (:

that will do!!

k bye

nobody stopped me

2009-08-04T00:51:00.002+08:00

ok so let me break it down here to no one in particular but i shall say that i'm not currently at a stage of my life which i have to decide too many things and have too little time to do and my emotions are moving like a freaking roller coaster to nowhere and its making me miserable, crazy, sad, lonely, heartbroken, ecstatic, mad, sad, clueless, hopeless, suicidal and what not and i seriously need help now or i'm gonna start doing some stupid crazy things..

ok ive alr done some stupid crazy things..

IN OTHER NEWS

i've decided to stop deluding my life and wake up.. damn it hurts alot for everything that has happened..

but i think the old me is coming back... people are gonna hate me again (:

now someday one of yous will be mines muahahahaha... just hope its the right you XD

i've tied my soul into a knot, so no one can steal it..

2009-07-27T01:43:00.003+08:00

how i longed to go crazy
and i've already done so...

i seriously don't find a purpose anymore

i have no one

the only one i love don't even know i exists..

for why should my life revolve around her??

cause u don't know her, neither do i, but that's not the point

if you've seen her, if only you've speak to her

you will hear bells in her voice
the ocean in her eyes
divinity at its finest

but you shalt be mine divine for i am just a coward, preaching to the crowd

for i don't want to make empty promises, twisted lies, pointing fingers, making myself sound like a saint when i'm just a fucking hypocrite.. but the world just revolves that way

my memories for you are dead now, it is not for what it used too be,
but even old fire can sometimes relight itself, cause you know how much you meant to me. though it can never be the same..
you know how mad i go for something you did against me.. yet some people never learn, for i am only a filthy mortal

wanna know why i write this up? cause no one will ever read this blog, well i think..

anyways.. if you do read, you may feel guilty, disturbed, flustered, shocked or plain don't give a fuck by the above post, then you should know who you are..

toodles!

p.s : boogaboogaboogabooga you know u deserve it sooner or later.. (:

lets not move anywhere other then in my own deluded, crazy, morbid, pathetic excuse i call my shrine of mind

waking up in singapore (WTF)

2009-07-22T17:16:00.002+08:00

come what ever may, there's gonna be a day

when i'll figure out a possible solution...

just maybe (:

damn i really really really really really really really really really really really need to accidentally meet you again..

maybe if i try making a wish on a star

i hear your voice
i smell your scent
i feel your presence
i see your smile
but all is in my head

let it be..

i'm really losing it now O_o

tie my soul into a knot

2009-07-20T23:40:00.003+08:00

the princess told the fool she don't like to be used just to be disposed by others..

being the fool he is, he sympathize her and gave a listening ear

how foolishly the fool didn't know that he was also being used as a tool for her

she uses the fool only when she needs to be heard, to be listened..

tossing the fool away when she finds herself satisfaction, or better entertainment

for the fool is not a necessity but more a reliability, only used when needed and leave unattended when not needed..

all will be fine, but not for the poor fool..

well, what can you expect from a fool.. he will never learn

three nil.. now fuck off

2009-07-10T01:35:00.002+08:00

18 years, my life is a big pile of..

..chaos? it's just the beginning.
Every promise i made? i'm rescinding.
Center mass in the middle of the monster, i'm getting tired of drowning the constant cry for help.
It's debatable, the only reason that you love me is cause i'm hated by all.
Come on!!, come see dysfunction, hehe, I guess we're gonna leave it for open discussion.

who am I?

where am I going?

maybe I'm looking in the wrong direction?
or maybe I'm looking for any direction?

this is not my war
this is not my fight
this is something more
this is not my life
this is not my revolution
this is not my convolution
this is not my expectation
this is not my desperation...

holed up, scarred, and tamed for the hell of it now look at me!
I'm the glorified malcontent
save me? save this!
all I got to do is give up, and all is forgiven
I'm sick of being the butt of a cosmic joke and I don't get the punchline
A million people lined up for miles to see the great big mouth?

SHUT UP AND APOLOGIZE!!

this is not my only reason to question why i said goodbye..

oh I didn't need to leave so stay right here.

i am the outcast
save me?
i am the liar
break me?
i can take anything
make me?
accuse me of everything
just kill me..
cut off the system
shape me?
deny my existence
waste me?
i won't be afraid
try me?
i won't be unmade
deny me?

come on, break it off, buy the lie, say it, come on, say goodbye

oh no you don't need to leave just stay right here..

GOODBYE!!

18years.. i think i'll manage a few more (:

do you remember the time when we...

2009-07-08T03:54:00.002+08:00

.. nah i don't think so..

no one does..

free my severed heart, give me yours (:

now i need my soul back please!!!

in my dream..

2009-07-04T01:10:00.002+08:00

.. i saw you (:

we were talking, for a very long time.. or maybe there wasn't even a time, time just stood still while i'm with you..

what did we talk about? i can't remember, but it doesn't matter.

the stars in the sky were so bright, the grass we sat on were soft, the wind blowing in our face..

you seemed so real.. your eyes, your hair, your lips, your skin.. everything was divine

then i had to wake up, cause reality just can't seem to let me be happy...

i guess i can survive with you only in my mind, just not in person (:

in other news..

i need to get a new mp3, damn mp3 just fucking died...

so time too save up... there goes next month salary, and i need my 800 bucks people!!!! damnit..

and i need to get another transformer... sideswipe and barricade is getting lonely XD

sideways?
bumble bee?
skids?
mudflaps?

or the voyagers?

optimus prime?
ironhide?
jetfire?

ahhhh!!!!

ps : cant wait to sleep again ^.^

that selfish act of selflessness

2009-06-29T23:28:00.003+08:00

that sentence fits perfectly to the movie i watched today..

transformers revenge of the fallen..

this movie really shows act of true selflessness

*spoiler alert*

the way optimus courageously protects sam from megatron, starscream and grindor till his life was taken from him..

i was really shock at that part.. one of those O_O moments. seriously, optimus freaking owned them XD

the way bumble bee protects sam from the clutches of decepticons after the death of optimus.

bumble bee freaking owns in this movie, he seriously kicks major ass, not to mention sideswipe's 10sec of glory against sideways.. damn that was to great to be bullshit, though i wished sideways could at least have fought in that movie

the way mikeala protects sam from the decepticon pretender and also not leaving him when the decepticons were after him

now thats one great and not to mention freaking hot girlfriend.

how jetfire sacrifices himself to revive optimus

jetfire was a big fan of the prime, and all he ever wanted was to see a prime and he literally gave his life to one..

the song new divide really suits the autobots duty to protect the planet..

damn its a great movie, eventhough the action is the major highlight, but i'm really touched by optimus and bee's sworn duty to protect the things they cherish the most..

the forest battle was the best part of the whole movie.... the impact of that scene.. wow

as i wish upon a star last night...

2009-06-27T16:44:00.001+08:00

i just wanna see her again.. is that too much to ask?

pretty please??

walkman (just had to make a title)

2009-06-23T14:02:00.002+08:00

events in june..

13th june sat : celebrate twin's bday :)

can't remember anything else from then on...

18th june thurs : went cycling, see people fall down and injure herself.. :|

19th june fri : went to malaysia with feeka/hida/amalina.. :S

20th june sat : slept for 19 hours .. FUCK YEA BEAT THAT U MUDDAPARKERS!!!

21st june sun : celebrate sis's bday :)

22th june mon : met some old friends.. @_@

23th june tues : enrolled licensce ..

and now i am sleeepy but it's only 2.13pm.. sooo sleepy time!!!

IN OTHER NEWS...

vermilion means everything to me now... if only she knew..

''she isint' real, i can't make her real''

we all, got left behind

2009-06-17T22:04:00.003+08:00

Once, a long time ago, when we first met
Under bright lights, and the circus tent
With colors and people moving way to fast

Hello, it's so nice to see your face again
Hello, it's so nice to see you
All good people find one another
Hello, it's so nice

I wouldn't say, I couldn't say
Just how much I needed you to rescue me
I was down and out
In a rabbit hole
Pulled me up and pulled me out
Dragged me from a drug
That made the voices shout
Remember your home
You are home now

Hello, it's so nice to see your face again
Hello, it's so nice to see you

I couldn't stay, I wouldn't stay
In a place that was not meant for me
I was so far out of my head
And my element
I could not be, I would not be
Now that I am home I'm not alone
Living my life right
I can breathe now

Hello, it's so nice to see your face again
Hello, it's so nice to see you
All good people find one another
Hello, it's so nice

Hello, hello, hello, laaaaa
Hello, hello, hello, laaaaa

Hello, it's so nice to see your face again
Hello, it's so nice to see you
All good people find one another
Hello, it's so nice

Hello, hello, hello, laaaaa
Hello, hello, hello, laaaaa
All good people find one another
Hello, it's so nice

Dirty Little Rabbits - Hello

shawn crahan rocks!!

in other news..

damn freaking long since ive updated... waddefuck running out of ideas
suicidal attempts failed
i'm a living corpse living in blissful denial

now if only i can go on to write more random outburst..

pish!!

IN OTHER NEWS!!!!

feeka give me ur link again pls my little quinn XD

IN UDDER NEWS!!!

16 cows were killed by one lighting.. O_o its true.. read the news... poor cows..

IN OTHER NEWS!!!

i'm being stalked by a murderer, pervert and flashback bully who now wants me to resides in her armpits, when questioned, she replies 'its sharing' WADDAFUCK!!!

ps : see, i posted ur request XD

in other news... waddefuck is with the in other news thingy?

I NEED A NEW BLOG SONG!!

In other..shadaparkapalwee...

lying voices inside my head

2009-06-03T00:32:00.002+08:00

It doesn’t get easy, don’t you know




Little girl, little girl

Why are you crying?

Inside your restless soul your heart is dying

Little girl, little girl

You dirty liar..


orgasm? = a spasm of love and hate

death to the little girl at the end of it

.. and carved our names

remember?

i am not a victim, till i let you take me down

don't need to bother

i only wanted to see you

it doesn't matter if i scare you

noises noises all the time i hear noises.....

2009-05-26T19:53:00.004+08:00

why the fuck do you intrude my life??

seriously, stop bothering other people's fucking well being and take care of your own life first before trying to play god and fix others.. damn you

get a life? i'm happy with mine, seems like you should change your life since you keep asking people to be like you, that means you don't feel comfortable with yourself or maybe your life is tooo fucking great that you MUST INSIST on asking people to change theirs.. bullshit much?

denial? contradicting? don't bullshit yourself, if you're too perfect to make mistakes then just leave the godamn planet and join the ALMIGHTY and play THE PERFECT game.

imbeciles that bothers other people's life saying u should change your life. seriously? ure bothering someone perfectly happy with themselves? aren't you the one with the fucking problem there?

stop asking people to do something which they are against, seriously, its their live, does your anus have that much itch in it that you must piss every single godamn human on this fucking piece of land just to show you are that 'in'?

judgmental? you judging someone? who the fuck are you to judge someone else? are you that flawless? you don't make any mistake in this little imperfect world? so you make a little occult of simple minded scums to hate another person for your own enjoyment? are you like 7?

how unbelievably dimwitted and naive are you?

seriously just shut the fuck up and take care of YOUR lives first before bothering about others

mr and miss oh so perfect and cool

*if anyone feels offended with this post than obviously you are guilty of such*

emotionally deprived my ass..

2009-05-24T00:59:00.002+08:00

shall not think anymore which will involve anything to do with having any emotional string attachments in them.. affirmative

omg!!

2009-05-21T21:48:00.002+08:00

holy shit its already thursday?? muddaparkercarparkpishinthesea!!

tomorrow is tekken day!! yay/boo?

yay : i can get to play, maybe vs some ppl, and win some matches with drag ffs!!!

boo : wat if there isint anyone to vs, thn money wasted...

haiz

haiz

haiz

haiz

haiz

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

oo dots...!!

damn, i need to see my shrink again... FEEKA!!!! WHERE ARE THOU!!??

2009-05-17T00:41:00.002+08:00

you haven't learned a thing, i haven't changed a thing

to that backstabber in my class, lets just hope karma pays u back, cause i'm just not bothered to entertain you

nice surprise on last Wednesday XD *btw u speak too soft!!, half the time i didn't hear ya*

gotta get joggin again on monday..

hectic!!

freaking out for next wed!!

oh ya, nice surprise today *shirtless drag for the win*

FREE SHIRTLESS ITEM!!! XD

April Rain

2009-05-12T23:49:00.000+08:00

How does it feel when all you’re counting on is scatterbrained
Every wind that you have sailed upon, a hurricane
Every summer you have seen was filled with April rain
It doesn’t get easy, don’t you know

Fortune smiles on you
You’re not watching, dig that hole deeper
Fortune smiles on you
You’re not watching, create your own fate

Count your blessings and prepare to change your point of view
All those days that you spend waiting won’t come back to you
Take off the glasses that have treated your world black and grey
It doesn’t get easy, don’t you know

Fortune smiles on you
You’re not watching, dig that hole deeper
Fortune smiles on you
You’re not watching, create your own fate

It keeps raining
Keeps raining

It keeps raining ‘Cause you're blind,
Keeps raining ‘cause you're tired,
Keeps raining 'cause you're blind to fortune’s guidance now

It keeps raining, ‘cause you're blind,
it will keep raining, ‘cause you're tired
It keeps raining, ‘cause you're blind oh,
it will keep raining ‘cause you're tired

Fortune smiles on you
You’re not watching, dig that hole deeper
Fortune smiles on you
You’re not watching, create your own fate

jessica origliasso = lisa origliasso

2009-05-03T21:41:00.001+08:00

220wins 81losses

I WIN 16 ROUNDS TODAY!!!! and lost 4

:D :D :D :D :D

the veronicas = hot :D

BYE

school and girls

2009-05-02T01:37:00.002+08:00

they have a lot of things in common yet so different

its like, u wanna get into the best school and get the best girl, but the first one is much more simpler to get even though the former is much more worth it in a sense of productivity

I'll list down the theories that i have that differentiate them

money : we pay thousands of dollars a year for school supplies and funds which we do against our own will, but we hope to get sex for the price of movie and dinner.

support : when it comes to school, everybody is on your side, you've got people recommending stuff to you, people proposing courses to you, people willing to guide throughout the year. who will help you get laid?

false advertising : when you're gonna apply into poly/jc/ite, they will show you great adverts, making you wanna join it.. and they also look through your picture and your results and poof. ure the right candidate. how many people respond to personal ads thinking they've found the perfect match only to be bitterly disappointed upon meeting them?

safety : you will apply to every available school you can get your hands too, just so you can get into something and not drown hopelessly.. if the object is to get a job in the future, then any school is better than no school at all.

you know how people make a list of all the school they can/can't/maybe get into?

lets make one for the girls :D

UNREALISTIC, BUT WORTH FANTASISING ABOUT
- this are the girls you see with loads of bf, once they broke up, there get the next one and they look so good looking like thos pictures of artist/pornstars world wide..
- lesbians
- the best looking ones
- the one that pretends they are the best looking ones
- the bitch
- the sluts
- the stars
- the hotties
- my ex
- your ex
- his scandal
- her lesbian partner
- those older than you

MORE REALISTIC
- everyone else that don't fall on category above
- but most probably you/me won't be interested in this kind cause they are mediocre

SAFETIES : incase we need a last minute date lol
- your female best friends :D (no offence ladies)

IM JUST KIDDING ABOUT THIS... sort off

ur garbage in is garbage out ? WATAPARK?

2009-04-30T21:03:00.002+08:00

MUST------FOCUS------ STOP------- STONNING---- O---M---G

oh ya..

FUCK NEW WORLD ORDER!!!

i'm so gonna be in the resistence army if this bs happens!!

2012!!!!

srsly.. i must stop this outburst

super buick

2009-04-29T01:13:00.001+08:00

hello stranger :) can i see you again soon?

hope so :()

before i forget

2009-04-28T01:26:00.002+08:00

Auel Von' Faux
3rd dan
204wins 77losses

Loki Von' Faux
TBA!!!

i beg you, burn me away,

i won't become your hero just to fight the life i saved
nor will i give up tomorrow just to lose it all today

but, i'll try again tomorrow for sure :D

pulse

2009-04-26T02:25:00.002+08:00

i have been waiting for someone like you, and now you're slipping away

what have i done now?

like breathing in sulfur

2009-04-22T02:33:00.002+08:00

it can either suffocate you or you can embrace it with open arms....

suffocating, hallucinating, day dreaming, wondering, stoning...

time - will take it's toll to re-evaluate myself
truth - impaired , can't moderate
tension - escalates myself, i can't tolerate
blind - the only ambition that i can navigate

if you feel sometimes we're falling, like we're falling away. i would not blame you....
will we pay the price we pay?

corrupted - let the silence penetrates

echoes - the void now disintegrate

why am i becoming like this :(

fuck this......

equip back sleek base, choose colour, equip wolf :D

2009-04-18T00:57:00.002+08:00

197w 75l 72% - got the next customization :D

does it make me happy? - yES!

i believe everything happens for a reason, either it be fate or destiny, but i think there are more coincidences then anything else that happens here..

wished i could have talked with you more.. after picking up that lip gloss.. but i guess some things are really just coincidental

she was divinity's creature
that kissed in cold mirrors
a queen of snow
far beyond compare
lips attuned to symmetry
sought her everywhere
dark liquored eyes

my nightmare

if whatever u treasure wants itself to be destroyed, then let it, cause treasures weren't yours to begin with

2012

2009-04-15T22:24:00.002+08:00

dear earth,

I've heard some prediction, assumption, speculation, rumors , attempt of you going to end.. why is that so dear earth? is something bothering you? are u feeling sad?

is it because of the pollutions that we humans are making every single day? is it making you sick? that is why you are dying?

or is it because of the on going wars in the country? the killings the explosions and destruction of your soil making you feel sick?

or because of the the way us humans are treating one another, with racism and discrimination making you sad?

but i heard that in 2012, you are going to be blown up? and also aliens from the planet nibiru is going to come to earth and end us all, and also there is the prediction that mother nature will hail us with destructions everywhere

well the blowing up part is kinda stupid since, well, u could just simply do it now haha , don't have to wait till your sister and brother planets to align together with you to blow yourself up, it will just make them sad D:

what about aliens from the other planet, scientist said that the planet has same intelligence as us here, but if it was true, why can't we see it in space? if it is too far too be seen, would'nt it be too cold for the living creatures there to survive since they are the same intelligence as us thn they can't survive minus 0 temperature, can they?

any way, even if they do come here, i don't think it's that hard for them to defeat us, since we are already killing ourself with wars here, :D making things easier for the enemies.

about mother nature taking a piss at us all, i think we deserve it... after all we did to her anyways so yea..

so dearest earth, i can't wait till 2012 happens.. and hopefully i'll make it to 2013 to see when else you are gonna have another predicament that you are gonna , how do they say it this days, SNUFFed it.. till then :D

ps : if the world is gonna end in 2012.. i'll make a list of 10 things i wanna do before, WE SNUFFED IT hehe

in no particular order :

1 . learn playing the turntables
2 . ask for forgiveness to everyone i've ever done wrong to
3 . perform together with slipknot!!
4 . meet sharon den adel in real life
5 . find my true love XD
6 . do that thing with person mentioned in number 5
7 . smoke weed
8 . hijack a plane
9 . learn kick boxing
10 . go to space

i guessed i've spoken enough today

qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm

2009-04-12T00:44:00.004+08:00

MONDAY

woke up sick...

played game the whole day

dreading for sunday

TUESDAY

still sick..

babysit

played arcade

targeted to quest all the way till sat :D

dreading for sunday

WEDNESDAY

recovered..

cant remember what i did :/

dreading for sunday

THURSDAY

played arcade..

totally broke.... OMG!! NOO!!

dreading for sunday

FRIDAY

arcade!!

made new friends

someone turned pro

von'

blablabla

oh ya, dreading sunday

SATURDAY

babysit

screaming

crying

spitting

lucky those aren't my kids >:(

dreading sunday....

SUNDAY

dreading next sunday...

it feels good when u have smth to look forward to even though u're dreading it :P
hahahahahaha
work in 9hrs time and i'm not gonna sleep, gonna play psp later... yea im hopping i'll sleep on the job and get fired but that's just wishful thinking :D

been kinda depressed lately

i think i finally found the reason.. yay me!

hmmmm....

time to listen to aquarius again :D..

dragunov? bryan? anna?
stick to steve???

^
^
^
^
^

I NEED ANSWERS!!!

thx :D

2009-04-10T10:37:00.003+08:00

Just a few seconds away from everyone
From everything
Just a few seconds away
A second of your time and an inch of my own space

Silence
Quiet
Need a little peace of mind
After all this
After all that you do

Shut it up
Zip it
I need a little time to think
Without all this
Without all that you do

Keep it
Don't want it
Think I'll just go away
Away from here
From you

Time out
Walk it off
Think I need to throw a flag
Just a little break from the games that you play

Beat it up
Whip it out
Top it with a little scream
All that you are
For all that you do

Crush it all
Kill it
Calling out my enemy
Don't want anything
I want nothing from you

Dry it up
Baby
Turn around and walk away
Cry your tears
Pussy

Lift it up
Destroy it
Build it up to tear it down
All the little things that make me run away

Stop talking
Stop bothering me
Just walk away
I've had enough today

I have a life too
I've had enough of you
Feel like screaming
So go the fuck away

Go away

Just a few seconds away from everyone
From everything
Just a few seconds away
All I want from all of you
Just a few seconds away
Away from this
It's never ending
Just a few seconds away
A second of your time and an inch of my own space

i am agent peach :D

2009-04-06T16:32:00.002+08:00

while walking to work in the morning.. this convo took place

him : every morning this place always crowded

me : yea haha

him : all going to sentosa

me : yea, all go there to have picnic with their frends

him : yea..

me : we will never have this kind of stuff

him : haha why?

me : cause we always busy

him : haha yea

me : and if we are not busy with things, we are busy fighting right?

him : yea...

people change... why can't i? i want to change... anytime soon would be greatly appreciated :D

unlucky.. lucky.. just?

2009-04-03T22:08:00.002+08:00

hospital??

broke specs

half blind

met eunice

183w 64l 1st dan ------- 189w 66l 3rd dan :D

golden azazel = 20k

dutch ladies XD

for ______

2009-04-01T00:16:00.001+08:00

A fit and perfect stitch of foreign parts

Whose beauty fostered poets

Whose laugh like silver bells

Thawed your bitter winter from my path

Whose hair spun onyx is run with gold

Her rouge lips smack of dark blood

Her name in whisper rolls

Forever on my tongue

Lest her memory dissolve

i think i lost it... sob..

2009-03-30T03:17:00.002+08:00

4 hrs of sleep this time round... wowowowowowowowowow high on caffeine haaajhhbasfvdkvas

religious debates, fucking hate it.. burn in hell all u preachers!!

library! i saw more ass babey!! wooo!!!

btw had 12 cups of nescafe :P.... BECAUSE I CAN MUDERPARKER!!

walked around in circles....

now if only i can figure out what those things are that keep staring at me everytime i notice thm staring at me... what are they??

maybe i'll find out tmr.. oh wait.. its tmr alr.. tmr tmr? *1000brain cells dies*

7 hrs of slp isint enough for me on a holiday!!

2009-03-29T00:21:00.002+08:00

>:[]

walk outside with 2 handphones.. cause i can

bought a ring.. cause i can!

didnt switch off com while outside.. CAUSE I CAN!

forgot to bathe... cause i.. err.. okay.. -.-

achieved my 2year goal!!! :( FUCK! NOW WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO ONLINE!?

www.xxxbabexxx.com lololol

-.-!!

OHMYFUCKINGODTHISONGISKILLINGMEBUTICANTSTOPLISTENINGTOIT

tell how would you react if the song is about the girl fucking touching you all around!!!!!!

:[)

yea take that mother fucker! why? CAUSE I CAN!!

i have no clue what happend..

2009-03-27T20:55:00.002+08:00

WHATHEFUCKHAPPENTOMYSONG??? MUDDAPARKER!!!

zombie
the show
12hundred
mp3 jammed..
smelly kids in the bus causing ruckus

win,win,win,lose,win,win,win,lose,win... still 1st dan

bird eating human spit on the ground

900k to go..

why only that one motherfuckingasshole has to start it... if that one person just, ARRRGGHHHHHHH!!!!!

shhh....

just some stuff i encountered today..

it can be anybody, can look like anything at all, anyone at all, you can never tell, like other people, they look like human beings..

hmm ok..

2009-03-26T16:05:00.002+08:00

MONDAY

woke up. switched on pc, can't, called hp, pc spoil.. great.. received sms, kicked from band...
at nite.. went library, borrow books, go up to arcade, was playing alone till this dumbassninabitch came and his gay dude vs me, used asuka, parried him once.. lost..

great day..

TUESDAY

first text.. meet at 1.. second text.. meet at 5..
time : 5:30 -- me > at home slping :)
can't sleep, watched mtv until 3am...

damn..

WEDNESDAY

went out.. played lan.. yea...

THURSDAY

repairdude came, fixed com.. everything has to be re- downloaded.. great.. its like a new com only it isint..

life is soo epic..

ps: first normal post in history of my first normal posts..

why?

2009-03-22T22:59:00.004+08:00

... is everything so gray?

... is everything so strange?

... is everything so thrown together by mistake?

... is everything so insincere?

... is everything so out of sight?

... is everything so wrong?

... does everything seems so wrong?

... is everything look drawn?

... is everything seems like it don't belong?

... did everything go bad?

... did everything fall?

... did everything just decay?

... did everything lose its purpose?

... did everything come back?

... did everything relapse?

... did everyone learn their lessons?

... is everything a lie?

... is everything your lies?

... is everything a sign?

... is everything always one sided?

... does everything depends on which side i'm on?

... never?

... now?

... isin't there an answer?

... don't i need an answer?

i just don't want to know why...

2009-03-17T01:19:00.002+08:00

I am a dominant gene!
live as I die,
Never say forever 'cause forever's a lie
The story changes but the ending will bore you.

I tried to tell you but you simply obeyed

They didn't listen so they threw you away

Now all you do is talk
I don't wanna hear your bullshit

Is this what you want?

This is where it begins....

This is where it ends....

They called us a dead generation!
They told us that we wouldn't survive

As you can see we're all plenty alive
Let's see you say that shit to our face

... some stuff to tell people about...

*anyone reading this please don't be offended, it only refers to you people only, not to them :)*

but seriously, don't get offended all u fucking ARGHH!!
What a skeletal wreck of man this is,Translucent flesh and feeble bones
The kind of temple where the whores and villains try to tempt the holistic tones
Running rampant with free thought to free form, in the free in the clear
And the matters at hand are shelled out like lint at a laundry mat to sift and focus
On the bigger...better...now...

We all have a little sin that needs venting
Virtues for the rending and laws and systems and stems that riff from the branches of office
Do you know what your post entails?
Do you serve a purpose?
or purposely serve?

For the rest of us there is always sunday
The day of the week that reeks of rest but all we do is catch our breaths
So we can wade naked into the bloody pool
And place our hand on that board
To watch the knives zig zag between our aching fingers

vacation is a countdown
T-minus your life and counting
Time to drag your tongue across that grain of sugar and hope you get a taste

What the fuck is all this for? What the hells going on? Don't get it? cause you're too much a dumbass? I could go on and on, but lets move on

Shall WE?

Say, you're me and I'm you.... and they all watch the things we do
And like a smack of spite they threw me down the stairs
WOW!
The great magnet of malicious magnanimous refuse
Let me go and plunge me into the dead spot again haha

That is where you go when there is no one else around

Its just you, and there was never anyone to begin with, now was there?
Right...

Sanctimonious pretentious dastardly bastards with there thumb on the pulse and a finger on the trigger... (yea i look up the dictionary..(: )

Say it's classified secret??

Classified my ass, that's a fucking secret and you know it

Its like ice but no pick,
a murder charge that wont stick
Its like a whole other world where you can smell the food but you cant touch the silverware ...what luck
Fascism you can vote for...isn't that sweet (:

And were all gonna die some day, cause that is 'fated'

When that time comes, say a prayer, say a phrase, get yourself together and... you know hehe

See whats happening??

i'm sorry, i could go on and on

but..

just remember

You!! *person reading this* are a nothing!

An accident! forget the freak
YOU are just nature

so just give up.. no really... give up... nothing more to hope, desire, detest, wish, whatever for?

oh ya for those of you who thinks this is about you.. just remember, its about ME nothing about you.. fucking self centered bastards..

TOODLES :D

once.. i had a dream..

2009-03-15T02:05:00.002+08:00

This one came from looking

This one opened twice

These two seem as smooth as silk, flushed against my eyes

This one needed stitches

This one came from rings

This one isn't even there, but I feel it more..

This one had it coming

This one found a vein

This one was an accident, but never gave me pain

This one you can't see

This one had me scared to death

This one was the first one

This one had not cured

This one here I like to rub on dark and stormy nights :)

This one was the last one

I don't remember how

all the memories are not dead, they are just scars now

goodnight :)

172wins 62losses AND STILL NO RANK UP!!! FUCKING HELL...

2009-03-13T21:25:00.002+08:00

as the title says... I'M PISSED!!! well not really, just wanna attract attention..

damn.... my life has gone back to its thrilling and exciting phase that i have no choice but to go back into regular normal posts without the usual subliminal messages..... O_o

...........................................................

......................................................
.................................................

...................................................
.........

............................................
....................................

by alwee..

INSANE!! am i the only one with a brain?, i'm hearing voices but all they do is complain, how many times have you wanted to kill? everything and everyone says you'll do it but never will!

i'm going crazy yes yes yes yes yes ye yes yes yes yes yes yes yes

ok...

oh ya!! i've finally finished all of it.. all 8 parts.. all done.. everything has been completed... ALL I NEED IS THE TITILES DAMMIT!!! I DONT HAVE NO TITLE!!! ARGGGHHHHHHH!!!!

current playist in my song list :

sulfur - slipknot
my immortal - evanescence
unwinding cable car - anberlin
happy? - mudvayne
dead memories - slipknot
bye bye beautiful - nightwish
when it rains - paramore
shit i forget - takes handphone
btw thats not a song - alwee
lol - abbrevation
-.- - emote
ok - short for okay

R.E - at the time of post made, alwee was actually in his room reading a book, i of course am not him..

ok seriously im just bullshitting now

whats with the bold word!!!!

uncyclopedia ----- wow

2009-03-11T15:12:00.002+08:00

found this article, fucking funny.. even though they were dissing my fave band..

from uncyclopedia

0 Sid- Turntables: That's right, you read that correctly. Turntables in a heavy metal band. Why? Because they can, mother fuckers! Sid's masks have gone from a gas mask, to a skull, to Mr Roboto. Why? Because he can, mother fucker!

1 Joey Jordison- Lead Drums: Joey Joridson's total lack of drumming ability led to the addition of two more drummers to cover up his bad drumming. In a rare moment of slipknot empathy, the band was too nice to tell Joey to leave, and kept him on anyway. His mask is a kabuki mask and we're told it's very scary.

2 Paul The Pig- Bass: Paul started out as a pig, then a chipmunk, then this dog thing. Why the obsession with animals? It's what he eats for dinner.

3 Chris Fehn- Backup Drums, Backup Growls: Chris was the third drummer to join the band because dammit, two just aren't enough; his other job is to "sing" backup for Corey, so in theory, he could leave the band and it probably wouldn't make much of a difference at all. He is the only member of Slipknot who does not wear a mask, as no mask in existence could fit over his dildo-like Pinocchio nose.

4 Jim Root- Noise Guitar: Jim Root was the only member whose mask got less scary over time, going from this angry big chin thing, to his real face. He wears tight jeans because he is unaware of who the fan base contains.

5 Silent "133" Bob aka Spiky Guy- Head Bobs, Button Pushing: Nobody really knows what Silent Bob does at their shows, or even if he's even a real member of the band. He's always there in the back, head bangin' away behind some sort of pedestal. It looks cool, though.

6 Clown- Backup Drums, Backup Screams, Baseball Bat, Sex with the Stage Props: Clown is completely unpredictable. He'll get into fights with anyone for any reason, so long as there is money involved afterward, and he'll bang on anything with in reach. He can do anything except play music. His masks themselves have suffered massive head-wounds doing God knows what after the shows. Ironically, he's the only member of the band classy enough to wear a tie.

7 Seven- Thrash Guitar, Kick-ass Beard: This is a man obsessed with the number seven. Maybe it's because it's the number of dirty words you're not allowed to say on TV. He likes to bend over when he plays, because he'll never be happy unless he's in constant back pain.

8 Corey- Lead Screams: He! is a world before he is a man. He! was a creature before he could stand. He! Will Remember before he forgets. BEFORE HE FORGETS THAT!

Discography

Singles

Wait, Wait, Wait, and Wait Some More - 1998
Spit it in - 1999
...Baby, One More Time - 2000
The Cuddly Anthem - 2001 (This song was banned from Columbia because of 9/11)
Amazing Grace - 2001
After I Remember - 2003
AAAA! - 2003
Insanely Social - 2009
All Girls are GONE!!! - 2010
I Love You - 2036

... gotta love slipknot

a tRIP to town..

2009-03-09T00:03:00.002+08:00

seriously... i can't go there, too much people... gaaah!!

times like this i wish situations like those movies/games where people turn into mindless zombies and only a few of the 'normal' ones have to fend for themselves..

but first i'll have to find an infection that can spread by air/touch/blood/human fluid which has no cure.. or maybe a cure.. no idea..

i think my brain is losing it...

reading political stuff really scares the shit outta me..

war erupting everywhere, dammit..

while people in singapore whine about not having the latest 'in' things..

well that's the world now..

looking forward for 2012 *know what i mean*
...

why am i even preaching?
its not like anyone's gonna come here n read this bullshit..
-.- wow... im going mental..

lesson of the day : a trip to town makes people insane...

now if only i can turn into those mindless teenager zombies... 'ME WAN NEW MUSIC PLAYER PLOX'

PARK Q!!!

left for dead.. (yes the game dammit)

2009-03-04T23:57:00.007+08:00

In this hole
That is me
The dead are rolling over
In this hole
Thickening
Dirt shoveled over shoulders

I feel it in me
So overwhelmed
Oh, this pressured center rising
My life overturned
Unfair the despair
All these scars keep ripping open

In this hole
That is me
A life that's growing feeble
In this hole
So limiting
The sun has set; all darkens

Buried underneath
Hands slip off the wheel
Internal path-way to contention

Peel me from the skin
Tear me from the rind
Does it make you happy now?

Tear me from the bone
Tear me from myself
Are you feeling happy now?

HAPPY?!

HAPPY?!

Are you feeling happy?

In this hole
That is me
Left with a heart exhausted
Whats my release??
What sets me free?
Do you pull me up just to push me down again?

just play the game..

anti - hero

2009-02-27T23:44:00.002+08:00

i need a minute..

to elaborate for everyone, the everyday bullshit things that you have done

your impossible ego fuck, is like a megalomanical tab on my tongue
you fucking touch me, i will rip you apart, i'll reach in and take a bite of that shit you call a heart

but i guess i don't care anymore

i don't mind being ogled, ridiculed, even made to feel minuscule..
cause if you consider the source, its kinda pitiful..

the only thing you really know about me is.... that's all you'll ever know!

Gently, my mind escapes into the relaxing
world of pleasure, a pleasure that'll take
my mind off the reality of my life,
my past life... life as I know it now.

And whatever may come, it slowly
disappears to somewhere in the back
of my mind. It will remain there,
until I wish to retrieve it.

Yes, I will stay here for a while,
for I need the break. A break from the
pressures of life, and everything
that lays in the palm of life's hands.

This mode is incredible. It's out of
this world. Too bad I must always leave it...
... but that's life.

as i close my eyes... i feel it all slipping away...

my nameless..

2009-02-23T01:02:00.003+08:00

Pathetic - benign!!
Accept it - undermined!!
Your opinion - my justification!!
Happy - safe!!
Servant - caged!!
Malice - heart of weakness!!
No toleration invade - committed!!
Enraged - admit it!!
Don't condescend - don't even disagree!!
Decide - decay!!
Disappoint - delay!!
You suffered then, now suffer unto me!!!!

Obsession, take another look.
Remember, every chance you took.
Decide, you live with me
Or give up? - any thought you want to be free?

Don't go..... I never wanted any body more then I wanted you
I know..... the only thing I ever really loved, was hate.

Anyone? NO!!
Anything? YES!!
Anyway? FALL!!
Anybody? MINE!!
Anybody? TELL ME!!
I want YOU!!
I need YOU!!
I'll have YOU!!
I won't LET ANYBODY HAVE YOU!!
Obey! ME!
Believe! ME!
Just trust, ME!
Worship! ME!
Live for! ME!
Be grateful! NOW!
Be honest! NOW!
Be precious! NOW!
Be mine! JUST LOVE ME!

Possession - feed my only vice
Confession - i wont tell you twice
Decide - either die for me
Or give up - any thought you want to be free.

now? now? now what??
Stay inside the hole, let me take control - Dominate!!
You were nothing more, you were something less - innocent!!
Something has to give - something has to break - omnipresent!!
Fingers on your skin, let me savage in
YOU DESERVE IT!!
definitely..

You're mine you are you are
You're mine yes you are
YOU'RE MINE!!!

yea right... sheesh

2009-02-20T23:19:00.001+08:00

Name: Alwee
Date: 2/20/2009
Colorgenics Number: 57034216

You are feeling really miserable at this time and you'd like to form a relationship with someone with whom you could really communicate. At the same time, whoever it may be, that special 'someone' must not conflict with your own belief system or ideals. This makes for tough going - but it would seem that the situation is only transitory. It will soon pass.

You are experiencing considerable difficulty trying to achieve your goals. As a consequence of this you are becoming more and more irritable. Your friends and acquaintances are finding it increasingly more difficult to appease or to reason with you. You are the cause of your own problems. Don't be so impulsive. It is your vacillation that can lead to problems and uncertainties. Ease up a little.

At times one is burdened with more than one's fair share of problems and this would appear to be your situation at present. But you are adamant - you know what you wish to achieve - and by giving a little and taking a little you may well find that the realization of your dreams could become a reality.

You feel that you must have co-operation from those close to you before the existing stressful situation can be improved. You feel that no-one understands you and this lack of understanding and appreciation makes you feel completely isolated. You need that feeling of security and would like to get away from what you now consider depressing shackles. You have that need to re-establish your own individuality but your sensual self-restraint makes it difficult for you to let go - to open up, but the way that you are feeling at this time makes you feel that 'Enough is enough' and you are prepared to give in. This disturbs you as you feel that this attitude is an obvious sign of weakness - an attitude to be overcome and so in spite of this situation you feel that in order to assert your own individuality you need to continue to practice self-restraint.

You are greatly impressed by individuality and have interest in people who have outstanding qualities. You try to imitate those people that you admire and their characteristics, hoping that you will be able to display similar qualities in your own personality.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT!!!

2009-02-20T16:16:00.001+08:00

Bones in the water and dust in my lungs
Absorbing archaic like a sponge
The ultimate way is the way you control
But can you stay if you detach your soul
Bury the present and squeeze out the past
The ones you endear to never last
Chemical burns and the animalistic
I'm just another hard line psuedo - statistic

Can you feel this?
I'm dying to feel this
Can you feel this?

Blood on the paper and skin on my teeth
Trying to commit to what's beneath
To find the time is to lose the momentum
You learn the lessons and immediately forget them
Automatic and out of my reach
Consult all the waste to find the key
Minimal life and the polysyllabic
I'm just another blank page - push the button, pull the rage

Can you feel this?
I'm dying to feel this
Can you feel this?

I am all, but what am I?
Another number that isn't equal to any of you
I control, but I comply
Pick me apart, then pick up the pieces
I'm uneven

I am the damaged one All my life and the damage done

2009-02-18T23:29:00.001+08:00

Wish I was too dead to cry
My self-affliction fades
Stones to throw at my creator
Masochists to which I cater
You don't need to bother;
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on,
I won't let go 'til it bleeds

Wish I was too dead to care
If indeed I cared at all
Never had a voice to protest
So you fed me shit to digest
I wish I had a reason;
my flaws are open season
For this, I gave up trying
One good turn deserves my dying

You don't need to bother;
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on,
I won't let go 'til it bleeds

Wish I'd died instead of lived
A zombie hides my face
Shell forgotten
with its memories
Diaries left
with cryptic entries

And you don't need to bother;
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on,
I won't let go 'til it bleeds

You don't need to bother;
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on:
I'll never live down my deceit

2009-02-15T00:35:00.002+08:00

How does it feel to be locked inside another dream, that never had a chance of being realized?

cause :

i've scream until my veins collapsed...

now all i do is live with so much fate...

it just never ends, it just, works its way around me

She was the sun
Shining upon the tomb of his hopes and dreams so frail...

while he was the moon, painting her,
with it's glow so vulnerable and pale...

but

she was also the wind, carrying all the troubles and fears, which he will have to try and forget

while

he will be the fire, restless and wild
and which she will be the moth, that burns in it..

she is everything and more, the solemn hypnotic...

though love is the only thing separating me from you..

:)

2009-02-12T21:20:00.003+08:00

I don't know why...
...I never told you
I don't know why...
...I never tried

When we shed these bitter skins again

All...................... the reasons come to life
But now..... it's over..

it's over, over...

I..... don't know why.....
......You never asked me....
...And I don't know why.....
You never cared

When we hide these little sins again

All the reasons

Have to die...

But now it's over
Now it's over

No!!

Chapter IV

2009-02-07T00:06:00.002+08:00

yes!

all your lies are coming true!!!

life is just a killing field.....

i'm gonna suffer for the rest of my life, but i will always find a way to survive
cause i'm a sinner to most but a sage to some!

Fake and defenseless lie..
..i tried to tell you first...
....hurtful lies are giving out

But you asked me, to love you and I did
traded my emotions for a contract to commit

In light of my ability to feel denial
I walk away from everything with just a smile :)

GO AHEAD AND DISAGREE, I'M GIVING UP AGAIN!

i'd rather feel pain than try to fit with you anymore
free my severed heart...

you want it all but you didn't want me
Hypocrite with no real use - I'm alive: what's your excuse?

i won't control, or restrain, things i do not understand...

Bury all your secrets in my skin
Come away with innocence
And leave me with my sins

cause,

we're the problem but we're also the solution

my only consolation is a lie

cause i won't let it build up inside of me

'til we die...

ThE sUbLiMiNaL vErSeS

2009-02-05T16:58:00.002+08:00

I don't know why...
...I never told you
I don't know why...
...I never tried

All the reasons
Have to die...
But now it's over
Now it's over

I am all, but what am I?
Another number that isn't equal to any of you!!

The only reason that you love me is that
I'm hated by all

I've left behind this little fact
You cannot kill what you did not create

Cause I don't think I'll make it through tonight

All that I wanted were things I had before
All that I needed I never needed more
All of my questions are answers to my sins
All of my endings are waiting to begin

(What is wrong with this??...Manipulation??...Violence and Chaotic)

BUT!!

She is everything and more... The solemn hypnotic

Do you understand? do you? DO YOU? Say it again!! say it again

no?

Fray the strings
Throw the shapes
Hold your breath
Listen!

i won't let it build up inside of me
SHE ISIN'T REAL, I CAN'T MAKE HER REAL!!!

Don't go!!! I never wanted any body more then you
I know - the only thing I ever really loved, was hurting you.

(shh, wait, shh, no, wait, wait, no, shh, wait, wait, not yet, no, wait, wait)

I'd die right next to you in the end....

wee too feel alone.....

aarrghh death death death!!!!

2009-02-04T16:45:00.001+08:00

here we go again MOTHER FUCKERS!!

it never stops - you can never be everything to anyone

noises, noises, people make noises when their sick, nothing to do except hold on to nothing..

NO ONE IS SAFE!!!!!

i know i'm just a bastard but at least i admit it...

but you're wrong, fucked and overrated, i think i'm gonna be sick and its your fault

Everybody is so completely sure of what we are
Everybody defames from miles away
But face to face, they haven't got a thing to say

my mind escapes into the relaxing world of pleasure..........

all my friends have pictures made to make you cry

too tragic to stay with you, too static to try for you...

because

we are the anti-cancer
we are the only answer
Stripped down, we want you dead
But whats inside of me, you'll never know
we are bipolar gods
we are you know what we are
My life was always shit
And I don't think I need this anymore

keeping myself alive...
through your empathy

YOU CAN'T TAKE MY SOUL AWAY FROM ME!!!!!

i took a life worth living and made it worth a mockery

Relax... it's over, you belong to me
I fill your mouth with dirt
Relax... it's over, you can never leave
I take your second digit with me ... Love...
You are... my first, I can barely breathe
I find you fascinating
You are... my favorite, lay you down to sleep
It's all that I can do to stop...
Love...
So blue... so broken, paper doll decays
I haven't left you yet
So cold... subversive, your eyes are full of bleach
Tomorrow, I will go away again... Love..
YOU ARE MINE, YOU WILL ALWAYS BE MINE
I CAN TEAR YOU APART
I CAN RECOMBINE YOU
ALL I WANT IS TO COVET YOU
YOU BELONG TO ME
I WILL KILL YOU TO LOVE YOU!!

quotas...

2009-02-03T11:01:00.002+08:00

the whole thing i think is sick

i can handle anything, even if i can't handle you

i'm hearing voices but all they do is complain

you haven't learned a thing, i haven't change a thing, the flesh was in my bones, the pain was always free

i am the very disease you pretend to be

since you never gave a damn in the first place, maybe it's time you had the tables turned, cause in the interest of all involved i got the problem solved and the verdict is guilty

tearing myself apart, from the things that makes me hurt

She lay as though she were in a trance,
With her long eyelashes fluttering like she was dreaming.

you all stare, but you'll never see, there's something inside me

i am not ashamed, what is vital, isn't always humane

i couldn't help myself , i just took you

i can't remember, i don't understand, is it malice that makes you this way?

i'm nothing more short of being one complete catastrophe

every reason is a right to hate

the candied heart that i select, she said don't hesitate, just do what you have to do to me

meet the man that made me, greet the can i came from oh the fucking sacred heart

2009-02-01T22:47:00.000+08:00

i took a certain online test today, which is about some things i can't remember, so hmm yea, this is like the result.

: others see you as sensible, cautious, careful and practical. they see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest. not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. those who really get to know you, realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over if that trust is ever broken.

don't know if its true or not, just something i think might be interesting to know about lol...

alright, i'll digress now..

i've always find love story to be really straightforward..

guy likes girl, vice versa. then , either one of this ending will occur..

guy and girl live happily ever after
guy died, girl lived
girl died, guy emo
girl died, guy died
guy died, girl died
both broke up never to see each other again
guy runs to another girl
girl runs to another guy

pretty much these are the outcome of a love story..

if i were to make one, i would make something like this..

a guy likes this girl, however he can never brings his standards up to her, thus only becoming friends with her, then, she falls in love with another guy, the guy that loves this girl so much, helps her be together with this other guy just so she could be happy because that is all he want for her is to be happy even if it isint him.. so the outcome is..

guy gave up girl to another guy to make her happy.. and she doesnt know it..

wonder if i can ever find a love story with that kind of ending... or... I CAN MAKE ONE !!! XD

p.s : yes all you people, no lyrics today, its a proper fucking post!! SUCK IT!!! XD

2009-01-31T10:32:00.000+08:00

how does it feel? that is the question.....

but i forget you wont expect an easy answer

are you ready for the time of your life?

2009-01-27T00:17:00.001+08:00

I know my uses, I have my pride, but my heart is still untamed
I learned my lessons, I've conquered Death, I go on and I'm unashamed
I'll paint your bones to match my eyes, They're the darkest I have ever seen
Until I'm lucid, I can't be told
I know my voices, They tell me to BELIEVE!

Another fucking accident out of control, all the attitudes will never change
my imitations are leading the way
I can't accept that I still don't find this strange...

I beg your pardon, I'm out of the way, a new conspiracy has taken my place
So over and over, I smell the decay
Believe what you want to --- The Cycle Stays The Same

In light of my ability to feel denial
I walk away from everything with just a smile
The agony of coming home has gone away
It's Everywhere, It's Everyone, It's Every Day

so lets pretend tat we have nothing to left to lose and just live how we want to.. :D

FREEDOM LOVE PEACE.. what do they really mean

2009-01-21T21:56:00.000+08:00

Freedom is just a word today
Freedom is just a word
When someone takes your word away it's seldom ever heard
So take a sentence full of things you're not supposed to say
Carry on, but don't write it down or you'll be gone

Love is just a song today
Love is just a song
When someone takes the song away
you seldom sing along
So take those lyrics serious and sing your life away
Carry on, but don't write 'em down or they'll be gone

Peace is just two fingers now
Peace was just a phase
When someone put it on a shirt
you knew to count the days
So take those fingers tape 'em up and shove 'em up your ass and carry on
but don't try it now cause peace is gone

All we ever do is talk
We like to ride but we never walk
We make it so damn easy
We get bored
Why can't anybody see what's good for you is bad for me

so stop talking about freedom, love and peace all u materialistic bastards..

2009-01-19T00:55:00.000+08:00

if u don't get this post, its alrite, you're not suppose to..

here goes....

tell me if i should stick around for you?

tell me if i can have it all

I'm just too tired too care anymore..

I'm told what to do and I don't know why...

quotes by the many i know off...

I'm looking at you through the glass, don't know how much time has passed,
oh god it feels like forever
but no one ever tells you
that forever feels like home, sitting all alone inside my head

cause things always happens like this,

Now I’m falling asleep
And she’s calling a cab

Now they’re going to bed
And my stomach is sick

And it’s all in my head

But she’s touching his chest
Now, he takes off her dress
Now, letting me go...

WHY?

cause i can't make a decision without making millions of conclusions first..

destiny is really killing me, my fate is non existing..

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

this second post is for my friend , joyce lee!!

see u make one sentence off frm ur post, i make one whole section for u sia... too bad ah i no pic too put XD...

oh ya frm nw on im gonna call u DARlingling!!! XD XD XD!!!

-.- im so dead now..

2009-01-12T22:58:00.000+08:00

Maze..

psychopathic daze... I create this waste, back away from tangents, on the verge of drastic ways... can't escape this place... I deny your face, sweat gets in my eyes, I think I'm slowly dying...

put me in a homemade cellar
put me in a hole for shelter
someone here me please!
all i see is hate
i can hardly breathe
and i can hardly take it!!!

HANDS ON MY FACE OVERBEARING I CAN'T GET OUT!!

Lost..

run at my own cost... fearing laughter, scoffed, running from the rush, detached from sucj n such
bleak... all around me, weak... listening, incomplete
i am not a dog, but i'm the one you are dogging...

i am in a buried kennel
i have never felt so final
someone find me please
losing all reserve
i am fucking gone
i think i'm fucking DYING!!

YOU ALL STARE BUT YOU'LL NEVER SEE
THERE'S SOMETHING INSIDE ME!!
YOU ALL STARE BUT YOU'LL NEVER SEE
THERE'S SOMETHING IN YOU I DESPISE

despise......... despise.....

Cut me!!
Show me!!
Enter!!
I am!!
willing and able and never any danger to myself
Knowledge of my pain!! knowledge of my pain!!

Or was my tolerance a phase?

Empathy, out of my way, I can't die!!!

you all stare but you'll never see....

have you seen death?
have you seen heaven?

i wish i haven't...

2009-01-10T16:46:00.001+08:00

look at my song..

see the title, says it all...

whatever..

Here we go again, motherfucker

Come on down, and see the idiot right here
Too fucked to beg and not afraid to care
What's the matter with calamity anyway?
Right? Get the fuck outta my face
Understand that i can't feel anything
It isn't like I wanna sift through the decay
I feel like a wound, like I got a fuckin'
Gun against my head, you live when I'm dead

One more time, mother fucker

Everybody hates me now, so fuck it
Blood's on my face and my hands, and I
Don't know why, I'm not afraid to cry
But that's none of your business
Whose life is it? Get it? See it? Feel it? Eat it?
Spin it around so i can spit in its face
I wanna leave without a trace
Cause I don't wanna die in this place

People = Shit (x4)
People = Shit (Whatcha gonna do?)
People = Shit (Cuz I am not afraid of you)
People = Shit (I'm everything you'll never be)
People = Shit

It never stops - you can't be everything to everyone
Contagion I'm sitting at the side of them
What do you want from me?
They never told me the failure I was meant to be
Overdo it - don't tell me you blew it
Stop your bitchin' and fight your way through it
I'M - NOT - LIKE - YOU - I - JUST - FUCK - UP

C'mon mother fucker, everybody has to die
C'mon mother fucker, everybody has to die

People = Shit (x13)
People = Shit (Whatcha gonna do?)
People = Shit (Cuz I am not afraid of you)
People = Shit (I'm everything you'll never be)
People = Shit

Got That? RIGHT!

2009-01-08T00:22:00.000+08:00

gently, my mind escapes into the relaxing world of pleasure, a pleasure that will take me, my mind off the reality of my life, my past life..

life as i know it now...

and whatever may come, it slowly disappears to somewhere in the back of my mind. It will remain there..

until i wish to retrieve it.

yes.
i will stay here for a while, for i need a break..

a break from the pressures of life, and everything that lays in the palm of life's hands.

this is incredible, its out of this world!

too bad i must leave it........ but that's life...

another year to be wasted again...

2008-12-31T02:28:00.000+08:00

We too feel alone

we too feel alone

i too feel alone....

that place in my mind, is that space that you call mine?

where have I been all this time? lost, enslaved, fatal, decline

I've been waiting for this to unfold

but..

but..

the pieces are only as good as the whole

severed myself from my whole life, cut out the only thing that was right

what If I never saw you again?

I'd die right next to you in the end

i won't let you walk away

Without..

Without..
.
.
.
.
Without hearing what I have to say....

NEVER!!!!

.Execute.

2008-12-23T18:47:00.000+08:00

It appears that we have reached the edge,
that zenith where stimuli and comatose collide.

Forty years ago, The man proclaimed
The age of the gross to be upon us,
and even though the man was destroying
our heritage and insulting our intelligence,
THAT ERA HAS BECOME VERY REAL.

We labor for pleasure and
abhor the guilt of pressure.

My generation will go down
as the architects of contemporary disgust.

Some have fought and died,
others have allowed the strong
to be butchered for a price
they themselves don't care about
and will never understand.

I myself am beleaguered
by the selfish face of
a kind of man that is not mankind.
distrust in information - fundamentalism of opinion
- catastrophic boredom,
and a fanatical devotion to that which
does not matter.

Where is your glory now?
Where are your gods and politicians?
Where is your shame and salvation?

You Rage for no reason because you have no Reason.

What have you ever fought for?
What have you ever bled for?
The face of the earth is scarred with the walking dead.
The age of the gross is a living virus.
This is the future you have created.
This is the world you have set ablaze.

all your LIES are coming true

all your FREEDOM is lost

all hope is GONE!!

now...

This is the year where hope fails you

The test subjects runs the experiments

and the bastard you know, is the hero you hate

But cohesion is possible if we try

There's no reason, there's no lesson

No time like the present, I'm telling you right now

What have you got to lose? what have you got to lose?

Except your soul...

2008-12-11T20:30:00.000+08:00

I can see you but you can't see me

I could touch you and you wouldn't even feel me

I'm just waiting, 'til you really let your guard down

Your relaxed,
Your sublime,
Your amazing,
You don't even know the danger you're facing
If I'm quiet,
I'll slide up behind you
And if you hear me I'll enjoy trying to find you

I've been with you all day
I'm trying to stay calm
I'm patient and it's really hard to breathe

Just keep the violence down
Not yet don't make a sound
Oh God I'm feeling it
It's reaching fever pitch
My skin is caving in
My heart is driving out
No mercy, no remorse
Let nature take its course

watch me (bring me to my knees)
waiting (I am your disease)
love (set my symptom free)
cover (you won't feel a thing)
YOU CAN'T STOP ME!!

wait!!

no!!

wait!!

no!!

wait!!

wait!!
not yet!!
no wait!!

I'm sweating through my veins
I'm trying to hold on
It's unbearable, it's almost worse for me
I'm gonna to tear you apart and make you see
MAKE YOU SEE!

It gets inside me
The crisis
The knife

It's almost time to play
It's time to be afraid
I can't control the pain
I can't control in vain
Oh God I'm ready now
You're almost ready now
I'm gonna raid it now
I'm gonna break it down

I see you in the dark
I see you all the way
I see you in the light
I see you bright as day

I wanna touch your face
I wanna touch your soul
I wanna wear your face
I wanna burn your soul

watch me (Bring me to my knees)
waiting (I am your disease)
love (You don't love me)

why not?

Purity...

2008-12-06T22:25:00.000+08:00

What about the girl?
She lay as though she were in a trance,
With her long eyelashes fluttering like she was dreaming.
And then all of a sudden her head dipped back and she vanished.

Gone, gone without a trace.
Gone.

She's never coming back, do you know what it's like to live with that?

No one knows what it's like.
The only one who knew,me, gone.
I know what you want and i can give it to you
I'm so tired
I'm so tired
Have you ever seen heaven?

I don't know how else to put this.
It's taking me so long to do this.
I'm falling asleep and I can't see straight.

Where am I supposed to hide now?
What am I supposed to do?
Did you really think I wouldn't see this through?

What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you.
What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you.

Wish I was too dead to cry, my self-affliction fades

you don't need to bother
I don't need to be
I'll keep slipping farther
But once I hold on,
I won't let go 'til it bleeds

its her eyes,
no!
its the lips?
nope!!!!
the hmm eyes??
no no no no no!!!
then what?
its everything..
O_O

2008-12-03T21:17:00.000+08:00

its over...

i lost...

pathetic...

i think i'll just give up on life for now...

all is gone now..

2008-11-28T18:02:00.000+08:00

I think I'm gonna be sick and it's your fault!
This is the end of everything.
You are the end of everything.
I haven't slept since I woke up and found my whole life was a lie!

This is the end of everything.
You are the end of everything!

Shallow skin,
I can paint with pain.
I mark the trails on my arms with your disdain.
Everyday it's the same, I LOVE, YOU HATE.!!!!!!
But I guess I don't care any more.

Fix my problems with the blade.
While my eyes turn from black to gray.
God, the worst thing happened to me today!
But I guess I don't care anymore.

My flaws are the only thing left that's pure.
Can't really live,
can't really endure.
Everything I see reminds me of her.
God I wish I didn't care anymore.
The more I touch, the less I feel.
I'm lying to myself that it's not real.
Why am I making such a big fucking deal?
I'm never gonna care anymore.

YEA RIGHT...

What the hell am I doing?
Is there anyone left in my life?
What the fuck was I thinking?
Anybody want to tell me I'm fine?
Where the hell am I going?
Do I even need a reason to hide?
I am only betrayed!
I am only conditioned to die!

You are wrong and overrated!
I think I'm gonna be sick and it's your fault!
This is the end of everything.
You are the end of everything.
I haven't slept since I found out my whole life was a lie!
This is the end of everything.
You are the end of everything!

.... wow...

2008-11-24T14:27:00.000+08:00

The world was on fire and no one could save me but you.
Strange what desire will make foolish people do.
And I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you.

what a wicked thing to do
to make me dream of you
what a wicked thing to say
you never felt that way
what a wicked game to play
to make feel this way

She is everything to me
The unrequited dream
A song that no one sings
The unattainable, She's a myth that I have to believe in
All I need to make it real is one more reason

A catch in my throat choke
Torn into pieces
I won't, no!
I don't wanna be this...

but...
i won't let this build up inside of me

She isn't real
I can't make her real....

2008-11-18T00:14:00.002+08:00

to : input name here

here goes... u r,

Pathetic (benign)
Accept it (undermine)
Your opinion (my justification)
Happy (safe)
Servant (caged)
Malice (Utter weakness)
No toleration
Invade (committed)
Enraged (admit it)
Don't condescend (don't even disagree)
Desire (decay)
Dissapoint (delay)
You've suffered then, now suffer unto me.

Obsession, take another look.
Remember, every chance you took.
Decide, either live with me
Or give up - any thought you had of being free

(Don't go) I never wanted anybody more than I wanted you
(I know) the only thing I ever really loved, was hate.

Anyone (NO)
Anything (YES)
Anyway (FALL)
Anybody (MINE)
Anybody (TELL ME)
I want (YOU)
I need (YOU)
I'll have (YOU)
I won't LET ANYBODY HAVE YOU
Obey (ME)
Believe (ME)
Just trust (ME)
Worship (ME)
Live for (ME)
Be grateful (NOW)
Be honest (NOW)
Be precious (NOW)
Be mine (JUST LOVE ME)

Possession (feed my only vice)
Confession (i wont tell you twice)
Decide (either die for me)
Or give up - any thought you had of being free.

(Don't go) I never wanted anybody more than I wanted you
(I know) the only thing I ever really loved, was hurting you.
(Don't go) I never wanted anybody more than I wanted you
(I know) the only thing I ever really loved, was hate.

Stay inside the hole, let me take control. (Dominate)
You were nothing more, you were something less (innocent)
Something has to give - something has to break (omnipresent)
Fingers on your skin, let my savage in
YOU DESERVE IT!
YOU DESERVE IT!
YOU DESERVE IT!
YOU DESERVE IT!

(Don't go) I never wanted anybody more than I wanted you (i wanted you)
(I know) the only thing I ever really loved, was hurting you. (was hurting you)
(Don't go) I never wanted anybody more than I wanted you (i wanted you)
(I know) the only thing I ever really loved, was hate.

You're mine (you are you are)
You're mine (you are you are)
You're mine
YOU'RE MINE

oh yes u knw who u r...

2008-11-13T23:22:00.001+08:00

I don't know why...
...I never told you
I don't know why...
...I never tried

When we shed these bitter skins again

All the reasons come to life
But now it's over..

I don't know why
You never asked me
And I don't know why
You never cared

Went we hide these little sins again

All the reasons
Have to die...
But now it's over
Now it's over

No!

Follow me (Follow me)
I've come so far, I'm behind again
Follow me (Follow me)
I wish so hard I'm there again
Follow me (Follow me)
Follow me (Follow me)

All that I wanted were things I had before
All that I needed I never needed more
All of my questions are answers to my sins
All of my endings waiting to begin

2008-11-11T21:31:00.002+08:00

im so confused... lol.. no seriously.. well ppl who reads this, try to understand what im gonna say, this is straightforward.. i assure u.

I have screamed until my veins collapsed
I've waited as my time's elapsed
Now, All I do is live with so much fate
I've wished for this, I've bitched at that
I've left behind this little fact:
You cannot kill what you did not create
I've gotta say what I've gotta say
And then I swear I'll go away
But I can't promise you'll enjoy the noise
I guess I'll save the best for last
My future seems like one big past
You're left with me 'cause you left me no choice

AHHH MY EYES!!! ITS TOO BRIGHT!!!! O_O!!

Put me back together
Or separate the skin from bone
Leave me all the pieces, then you can leave me
alone
Tell me the reality is better than the dream
But I found out the hard way,
Nothing is what it seems!
I push my fingers into my eyes
It's the only thing that slowly stops the ache
But it's made of all the things I have to take

......

one thing i notice abt ppl this days, they LOVE to lie.. whn u just meet someone, its casual n ppl go straight to the point, but its those ppl tat are close to u tat lie to u alot.

some say they do it to protect u?

if u lie to protect thn tat means the truth is evil?

or maybe they wanna bend the truth to shw tat they care?

seriously.. think for a moment..

maybe lying is good, too prevent u from the truth, or maybe they think u just can't fucking handle the truth because u have lived ur whole live in fairytales n wonderlands that u think everything will be happily ever after..

but even the truth aint tat great, u get smacked in the face n u cant get up for years n years n u just cant move on.. which in turn starts newer emotions ur 'loved' ones will shw..

this is life.. u think ure close with loved ones ard u, but the TRUTH is, u r alone... always was, always will be..

this wat the real world is alwee.. live with it..

everbody is a villain in the movie called 'reality'

2008-11-07T22:38:00.002+08:00

A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blog.

B) Tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by .

C) Continue this game by sending it to other people.so , the 8 people whom im sending this quiz to are : read part D

D) IGNORE PART A,B AND C :D thank you

01. What have you been doing recently? go sch, sleep, trying to loose weight

02. Do you ever turn your cell phone off? nope, unless under certain circumstances

03. What happened at 10.00am today? sleeping in my bed *escape sch* XD

04. When did you last cry? sec 1?

05. Believe in fate/destiny? yes, more on destiny though

06. What do you want in your life right now? i think they know, :D

07. Do you carry an umbrella when it rains, or just put up your hood? umbrella, ella,ella, eh eh eh

08. What's your favourite thing to have on your bed?BOLSTER!!!!

09. What bottom are you wearing now? my sec sch pants lol

10. What's the nicest text in your inbox say? thats MY LINE!!.

11. Do you tend to make a relationship complicated? hell no

12. Are you wearing anything you borrowed from someone? O_o no..

13. What was the last movie you caught? The Dark Knight

14. What are you proud of? no idea

15. What does the oldest text message in your inbox say? 'Nope. Chill'

16. What was the last song you sang out loud? dead memories - slipknot

17.Do you have any nicknames? Auel

18. What does your last received text message say? smth frm momok abt his love life

19. What time did you go to bed last night? 10+ - = ?

20. Are you currently happy? depends on the term happy..

21. Who gives you best advice? my cousin, my mom, my other self?????

22. Do you eat whipped cream straight from the can? wtf! disgusting piece of sugar lol

23. Who did you talk on phone last night? No one.

24. Is anything bugging you right now? Yes

25. What/who was the last thing/person to make you laugh? hmm playin tat aeroplane game lol

26. Do you wear toe socks? YES

27. Who was the last person you missed a call from? Wesley

28. Have you ever had your heartbroken? yea :(

29. What annoys you most in a person? the attitude, the lies!!

30. Do you have a crush on anyone? cough cough*

31. Have you ever done cocaine? NO

32. What is the colour of your room? YELLOW (WTF I DIDNT KNOW TAT LOL)

33. Would you kill someone you hate for a billion dollar? of course.. but by thn i think ill have multiple billion dollars lol

34. Do you believe in the saying of :"talk is cheap? yes

35. Who was the last person to lie in your bed? me

36. Who was the last person to hug you? long long time ago... well only feeks hug me ><

37. Did anyone see the last person you kissed? nope

38. Do you have a life? i'll get back at this later

39. Have you ever think someone died, when they really didnt die? yea..

40. What is the reason behind your profile song? before i forget?

41. Who was the last person you saw in your dream? hehe, can't tell :P

42. Last time you smiled? see tat emote at q41?

43. Have you changed this year? alot

44. What are you listening right now? snuff - slipknot

45. Are you talking to someone when you doing this? having conference with amanda, sam and neelam

46. Do you walk with your eyes open or closed? half closed

47. Is there a quote you live by? maybe, yea!!

48. Do you want someone you cannot have? yea..

49. Have you ever played an instrument? Yea

50. What was the worst idea you've had in this week? sending tat sms

51. What were you doing last night at 11.00pm? asleep

52. Are you happy with your love life right now? hmm, i don't have a GF nw so can't say no nor yes lol

53. What song best describe your love life? SNUFF!!!!

54. Does the person know that you like him/her? not too sure, she might get the hint..

55. Who always make you laugh? Friends, family- myself?

56. Do you speak other language other than English? english, malay, hmm yea..

57. favourite website(s)? none

58. What's your middle name? no idea.. i think i don't think i have one

59. What are you doing tomorrow? meeting amanda, sam and neelam

60. What do you think you are like? an idiot

61. Who will you choose to die with? wat for? rot tgt for eternity? sheesh..

62. Where have you been today? mosque, arcade, my home toilet alot..

63. What game do you play often? tekken, rs, dota (at sch), cs (at sch)

64. Who are you missing right now? rather not say, this is kinda one sided

65. If you have to choose between friend n loves, who will you choose? I want both!

66. What are you doing right now? having phone sex... u think? *doing this quiz*

67. Which primary school are you from? Xinghua

68. Name 3 colours that you like? white, black, grey

69. What emotion you like to show? hmm happy?

70. What is your life to you? Hmm...insanely dull with a pinch of tension

71. If you have something troubling you, what will you do? eat it eat it!!

72. Who did you last chat in msn today? feeks

73. Who do you admire most? at the moment, corey taylor

74. Which month are you born in? january

75. How are you feeling right now? slightly downhearted, confused..

76. What is the time now? 11.20pm

77. what kind of person do u think the one who tagged u is? no one tagged me, i just took it frm neelam

78.What colour did you use to dye hair? i don't dye

79. Why are you doing this test? i nd smth to blog abt..

80. What do you do when you're moody? stone..

81. At which age you wish to get married? before 30!! lol

82. Who is more important to you? girlfriend or friends? depends.. ur friends can't be ur wife

83. If today is the last day of your life, what will YOU DO? get laid, hmm rob a bank, jump frm the tallest building

84. Who is the person you trust the most? trust is a powerful word..

85. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after a rain? hmm, don't give a damn abt rainbows

86. If you have a dream come true, what would it be? lets hope its tat one

87. What is your goal for this year? tat goal..

88. Do you believe in eternity love? yea

89. What feeling do you love most? the feeling of eternal smth smth lol

90. Do you really think its Global Warming now? Yes

91.What feeling you hate the most? self conscious..

92. Do you cherish every single friendship of yours? yea.. hmm.. maybe.. yea

93. Do you believe in God? yea

94. Who cares for you most? My family maybe friends..

95. What do you think is the most important thing in your life? for nw, my alarm clock

96. What will you bring when you fight? hmm, clothes, shoes, mp3, money for water or bus ride

97. What have you done regretted doing in your whole life? tat thing.. n tat... n tat..

98. What would you feel if no one no longer cares for you? do u know of the joker tat was performed by the late heath ledger?

99. What if your boyfriend/girlfriend two-timed you? break up with her?

100.HOW DO U FEEL NOW? hungry.. WTF?

2008-11-03T19:42:00.002+08:00

Hard news, taken harder, don't look to me
Disappointed, we don't agree, I don't need your praise...
don't look my way for help,from the beginning you came to me
Never asked you to like me,
I don't want your praise
we won't play your games
Look down on me, spit in my face,
you're nothing to me
not to me.....

Darkened eyes you'll see,
there is no hope, no savior in me
don't look this way, don't breathe this way,don't stare this way, anymore
Learned from years gone by, no one will care,
what happens to me
don't look this way, don't breathe this way, don't stare this way, anymore

My presence won't be ignored, no not today
Don't walk in my direction, turn the other way
don't look my way for help, from the beginning you came to me
Asking questions, predetermined answers,
you won't find them here
we don't want your opinion
And I don't want you, I won't let you think,
compromise is near.
'Cause it's not nea

I'm alone in here
No more feelings
Killed my fears
Don't ask
you'll never know
you're left behind
and I'll be exposed

Far away, you keep on trying...
Holding me down, breaking away,
trying to distance my life.
Not one in the crowd, but one with the answer
the one that could change your mind

But it's not true,
I don't need you
Don't waste your time,
and don't waste mine
I'm not your friend,
I won't soothe your soul
And in the end
you're all dead to me....

say bye bye to him.. SAY IT!!

2008-10-29T21:33:00.001+08:00

Sitting in the dark,
I can't forget.

Even now,
I realize the time
I'll never get.

Another story
Of the Bitter Pills of Fate.

I can't go back again.
I can't go back again

But you asked me
To love you and I did.

Traded my emotions
For a contract to commit.

And when I got away,
I only got so far.

The Other Me Is Dead.
I hear his voice inside my head
We were never alive,
And we won't be born again.
But I'll never survive
With Dead Memories in my heart.

You told me to love you
And I did.

Tied my soul into a knot
And got me to submit.

So when I got away,
I only kept my scars.

The Other Me Is Gone.

Now I don't know where I belong
We were never alive,
And we won't be born again.
But I'll never survive
With Dead Memories in my heart.

Dead Visions in your Name.

Dead Fingers in my Veins.

Dead Memories in my Heart

2008-10-26T00:47:00.000+08:00

Since you never gave a damn in the first place,
Maybe it's time you had the tables turned
'Cause in the interest of all involved I got the problem solved
And the verdict is guilty...

...MAN NEARLY KILLED ME
Steppin' where you fear to tread
Stop, drop and roll
You were dead from the git-go!
Big motherfucker, stupid cocksucker
And if you're scared of me now, then you're dumber than I thought
Always is, and never was
Foundation made of piss and vinegar
Step to me, I'll smear ya
Think I fear ya? Bullshit!
Just another dumb punk chompin' at this tit
Is there any way to break through the noise?
Was it something that I said that got you bent?
Gotta be that way if you want it
Sanity, literal profanity hit me!

Spit it out
All you wanna do is drag me down
All I wanna do is stamp you out (x2)

Maybe it's the way you gotta spread a lotta rumor fodder
Keepin' all your little spies and leaving when you realize
Step up, fairy
I guess it's time to bury your ass with the chrome
Straight to the dome
You heard me right, bitch, I didn't stutter
And if you know what's good, just shut up and beg, brother
Backstab - don't you know who you're dissin'?
Side swipe,we know the Ass that your kissin'
Bigity-biggidy bitch boy, halfway hauser
Don't hear shit cuz It keeps gettin' louder
Come on, and get a face full 'o tatic
Lipping off hard, going home in a basket
You got no pull, no power, no nothin
Now you start shit?
Well, ain't that something?
Payoffs don't protect, and you can hide if you want
But I'll find you, comin' up behind you!

Spit it out
All you wanna do is drag me down
All I wanna do is stamp you out

'Bout time I set this record straight
All the needlenose punchin' is making me irate
Sick o' my bitchin' fallin' on deaf ears
Where you gonna be in the next five years?
The crew and all the fools, and all the politics
Get your lips ready, gonna gag, gonna make you sick
You got dick when they passed out that good stuff
BAM!
Are you sick of me?
Good enough, had enough!

Fuck me! I'm all out of enemies!

Spit it out
All you wanna do is drag me down
All I wanna do is stamp you ou

Spit... it out!

because its who she is.. let it be

2008-10-23T21:48:00.002+08:00

She seems dressed in all the rings
Of past fatalities
So fragile, yet so devious
She continues to see
Climatic hands that press her temples and my chest
Enter the night that she came home... Forever

Oh... She's the only one that makes me sad

She is everything and more... The solemn hypnotic
My Love, bathed in possesion
She is home to me
I get nervous, perverse, when I see her it's worse
But the stress is astounding
It's now or never
She's coming home... Forever

Oh... She's the only one that makes me sad

Hard to say what caught my attention
Fixed and crazy... Aphid attraction
Carve my name in my face... To recognize
Such a pheromone cult to terrorize

I wont let this build up inside of me

I'm a slave and I am a master
No restraints and unchecked collectors
I exist through my needs... to self-oblige
She is something in me that I despise

She isn't real
I can't make her real
She isn't real
I can't make her real
She isn't real
I can't make her real
She isn't real
I can't make her real

She seems dressed in all of me
Stretched across my shame
All the torment and the pain
leak through and covered me
I'd do anything ever to myself
Just to have her for myself
Now I don't know what to do
I don't know what to do
When she makes me sad

She is everything to me
The unrequited dream
A song that no one sings
The unattainable
Shes a myth that I have to believe in
All I need to make it real is one more reason
And I don't know what to do
I don't know what to do
When she makes me sad

But I won't let this build up inside of me
I won't let this build up inside of me

I catch in my throat
Choke
Torn into pieces
I won't......nope
I don't want to be this

But I won't let this build up inside of me

I won't let this build up inside of me

I won't let this build up inside of me

I won't let this build up inside of me... but i can't resist it.. its blissfully painful

She isn't real
I can't make her real
She isn't real
I can't make her real..... isint...

four words, first word points to self MY!!!

2008-10-22T00:48:00.002+08:00

gotta love that game i thought of as a last minute resort before i started to verbally insult my friends till they go emo.. :D ahhh i'm such an ass...

ah ah ah ah ha ha ha ha

i've got a mission, which will either fail pathetically, or epically, or emocally.. lol

gonna wish myself luck on this, i really need this more then anything else...

once i get the solo for seize the day, i'll play for her, just for her.. ^^

this song suddenly hit me kinda emotionally today, when i was showering at night while trying to pronounce the word 'R' in a sentence, which i bloody can't dammmmmiiitttt!!!111eleven!!11

well now im gonna try and hmmm 'sing' this song :D yea sing it hahahaeehehhaheeha

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love
Purpose hard to find
While I recall all the words you spoke to me
Can't help but wish that I was there
Back where I'd love to be, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you
Is to hold her when I'm not around
When I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again, oh no
Once again

There's nothing here for me on this barren road
There's no one here while the city sleeps
And all the shops are closed
Can't help but think of the times I've had with you
Pictures and some memories will have to help me through, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
To hold her when I'm not around,
When I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

Some search, never finding a way
Before long, they waste away
I found you, something told me to stay
I gave in, to selfish ways
And how I miss someone to hold
When hope begins to fade...

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love
Hope is hard to find

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
To hold her when I'm not around,
When I'm much too far away
We all need the person who can be true to you
I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again

so yea tat song, really effects how im feeling right now to that certain someone, hopefully no one sees this dammit.. ><...

lets try some 'normal' post again

I WASTE 15 BUCKS ON FOOD TODAY HAHAHA...

u just gotta hate those ppl u meet everyday that wear identical shirt as you then u get judged just because you look like them... wow...

ill get u, u took my first chance away from me, i'll get you...

2008-10-16T20:35:00.003+08:00

bury all your secrets in my skin
come away with innocence, and leave me with my sins
the air around me still feels like a cage
and love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage again...

So if you love me, let me go. and run away before I know.
my heart is just too dark to care. I can't destroy what isn't there.
deliver me into my fate, if I'm alone I cannot hate
I don't deserve to have you...
my smile was taken long ago, if I can change I hope I never know

I still press your letters to my lips
and cherish them in parts of me that savor every kiss
I couldn't face a life without your light
but all of that was ripped apart... when you refused to fight

so save your breath, I will not hear. I think I made it very clear.
you couldn't hate enough to love. Is that supposed to be enough?
I only wish you weren't my friend. Then I could hurt you in the end.
I never claimed to be a right...
My own was banished long ago, it took the death of hope to let you go

So Break Yourself Against My Stones
And Spit Your Pity In My Soul
You Never Needed Any Help
You Sold Me Out To Save Yourself
And I Won't Listen To Your Shame
You Ran Away, You're All The Same
Angels Lie To Keep Control...
My Love Was Punished Long Ago
If You Still Care, Don't Ever Let Me Know...

i had to look at other ppl's blog nw didnt i...

2008-10-15T00:07:00.002+08:00

FYI i will kill neelam yashwanth for this... XD

1. The 1st person who tag you is?
Feeks!!

2. Your relationship with ~~him~~/her?
Cousins!!! soul-mates :D

3. Your five impression of ~~him~~/her?
smart,adorable,blurr,irritating,FEEKAlicious :D

4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you?
can't tell that here eh eh eh..

5. The most memorable thing he/she had said to you?
AWEEEEE!!

6. You got any wish or request to ask from ~~him~~/her?
be my DEMI!! lol

7. As a friend,what he/she has to improve on?
she knows what she gotta do.. -.-

8. If he/she became your enemy,you will?
marry her

9. If he/she became your enemy,the reason will be?
cause i killed her crushcrushcrush..

10. The most desired thing you want to do for ~~him~~/her is?
let her forget that part of her life :D

11. Your overall impression of ~~him~~/her is?
she's soo good u can practically eat her hahahaha

12. How you think people around you will feel about you?
they hate me but are just playing along to like me, or isit the other way round?

13. Some characters that you like about yourself?
i fight for my rights

14. On the contrary, 1 character that you hate about yourself?
too heartless..

15. The most ideal person you want to be is?
SYNYSTER GATES!!!

16. For people who care and like you, say something to them.
i may nt shw it but i really love u ppl :D

17. Pass this quiz to 10person that you wish to know how they feel about you.
1. feeks
2. hida
3. alwee
4. syed alwee
5. auelVengEanc3
6. i
7. me
8. myself
9. that girl
10. that other girl

10 choices aint enough!!!

18. Who is no.6 having a relationship with?
no one (advertising myself!!!!)

19. Is no.9 a male or female?
that GIRL? im nt too sure..

20. If no.7 and 10 are together,will it be a good thing?
hopefully

21. What is no.2 studying about?
engineering i guess

22. When was the last time you had a chat?
approx i dont give a shit minutes n for what shud i bother seconds..

23. What kind of music band does no.8 like?
whichever is stuck in his head apperently

24. Does no.1 have any siblings?
Yes.

25. Will you woo no.3?
hell yea!!

26. How about no,7?
duh?

27. Is no.4 Single?
yea, no one wants him >< so sad hahahaha lol

28. What is the surname of no.5?
VengEanc3

29. What's the hobby of no.10?
dancing... (is that a clue?)

30. Does no.5 and 9 get along well?
tainted past but yea.

31. Where is no.1 studying at?
Temasek Poly

32. Talk something casually about no.1.
she is mine, mine, mine!!!! i booked her she is mine!!! ME!! MINE!!! NO TOUCHY!! NO RUB RUB!!

33. Where does no.9 live at?
2 blocks away frm me

34. What colour does no.4 like?
grey, black, white, brown, pink, red, lol, haha, hmm, ok,

35. Are no.5 and no.1 best friend?
1 is close with 5's alter ego

36. Does no.1 have any pets?
yes, n its the only thing that she loves more thn me, no fair...

37. Is no,7 the sexiest person in the world?
wait (look in the mirror) 1week too curly hair growth, sexy for the final week!!

38. What is no.6 doing now?
writing this blog duh? u dumb or stupid?

MY brilliant idea to start working.

2008-10-13T20:14:00.003+08:00

ooo i found something called compose here, so edit html wasnt the proper way to blog??....

fuck... oo wait... FUCK!! wow

rainbow!!!!

hahahahahahahahaha (insert more haha's)

first day of work.. toys r us is no kids thing.. how more cheezy can i get..

school has reopen, no literally the ceiling was ripped open and we were able to see the clouds during lesson :)

the freaking timetable is hmm freaking stressing, fuck this is suppose to be ite not jc wathefuck they giving all this people such a harsh timetable when all they want to do is waste their live??

wow i didnt even make a top rated, super confusing, hard to read, mind boggling, human rampaging, sex addicting, mortality wounding, moraly degradring, self deluded, uber sexy post..

(insert smiley face when felt necessery)

Where has he gone? they asked..

What have he done? they think..

A voice commands from high above this earth.

From the soilTheir blood cries out to me

MURDER, LIAR, VENGEANCE, DECEIT

2008-10-09T22:36:00.001+08:00

Can't you see I'm easily bothered by persistence
One step from lashing out at you
You want in to get under my skin
And call yourself a friend
I've got more friends like you
What do I do?

Is there no standard anymore?
What it takes, who I am, where I've been
Belong
You can't be something you're not
Be yourself,
Stay away from me
A lesson learned in life
Known from the dawn of time

Run your mouth when I'm not around
It's easy to achieve
You cry to weak friends that sympathize
Can you hear the violins playing your song?
Those same friends tell me your every word

Are you talking to me?

fuck off..

2008-10-08T23:22:00.001+08:00

Let me tell ya 'bout this girl I know
That comes alive when you take off her clothes
There's no tell just where shes been
Ask around but no one seems to know

Late at night when your looking to sin
Call her up and she'll lay down the law
You can't trust her 'cause she'll lie to your face
But that's not why you gave her a call

Awaits deep inside
The lust and burning desire

We've all been more than eager to sin
And it feels alright, 'till we pay the price
Now you choose either naughty or nice
'Cause shes here for you
Its all yours tonight
You won't believe the stories I've been told
About the girl I know

Another thing about this girl I know
Shes more comfortable down on her knees
Went to school, got a job, and then she shot into hell
All 'cause shes born to please

Don't get her mixed up 'cause she knows what she likes
Can't tell the difference between right and wrong
She knows you're watching every one of her moves
Just more reason to string you along, yeah

The first times hard enough
But you made it through
The seconds time I see the changes in you
Shes got you somehow
You're needing her now

About the girl I know

I Wish I Could Be The One...

2008-10-08T01:25:00.002+08:00

"I'll try," she said as he walked away.
"Try not to lose you."
Two vibrant hearts could change.
Nothing tears the being more than deception,
Unmasked fear.
"I'll be here waiting" tested and secure.

Nothing hurts my world,
Just affects the ones around me
When sin's deep in my blood,
You'll be the one to fall.

"I wish I could be the one,
The one who won't care at all
But being the one on the stand,
I know the way to go, no one's guiding me.
When time soaked with blood turns it's back,
I know it's hard to fall.
Confided in me was your heart
I know it's hurting you, but it's killing me."

Nothing will last in this life,
Our time is spent constructing,
Now you're perfecting a world... meant to sin.
Constrict your hands around me,
Squeeze till I cannot breathe,
This air tastes dead inside me,
Contribute to our plague.
Break all your promises,
Tear down this steadfast wall,
Restraints are useless here,
Tasting salvation's near.

Nothing hurts my world,
Just affects the ones around me
When sin's deep in my blood,
You'll be the one to fall.

"I wish I could be the one,
The one who won't care at all
But being the one on the stand,
I know the way to go, no one's guiding me.
When time soaked with blood turns it's back,
I know it's hard to fall.
Confided in me was your heart
I know it's hurting you, but it's killing me."

- Unholy Confessions -
- Avenged Sevenfold -

just being too happy or being deluded?
I'm doing something to cover my euphoria.

i say things that seems like it may be from fairy tales,
in which i don't believe in.

i don't believe in something but yet i make myself be blinded by it to keep myself happy.
i doubt its worth it.

maybe cause I'm just a coward.
maybe i prefer bliss over grieve
maybe i just don't want the other party to feel hurt
maybe that's why it always never work out.

i need to change my perspective, i can't just play it safe anymore
i played it safe once, i did something so terrible, I'm still shaken till now

or, maybe I'm just one of those type of people that must make simple things, complicated.
i hate showing my problems because it shows my weakness but in doing so,
I'm revealing more of my weaker side.

someone told me she hates me because of my attitude,
how i show myself as being someone so heartless even though i care but i can never show it.
in a way i think i know what she is trying to say.
i am being to heartless towards people that i've lost my soul, i'm just a living thing, thats all, nothing more.

I'm not making any fancy post today.
because i want people to understand my problem,
i think i need to show it, somehow
i've been lost in a way, lost my soul that is.

today it happend to me, i got a big slap in the face, just by one simple un-replying of someone.

i asked a simple question which did not receive its simple answer,
then possibilities were created in my mind,
maybe she is busy,
she is overseas,
she did not receive the message due to it being intercepted,
she choose not to reply cause i might be being too pushy,
she choose not to reply cause she knows what i am up to,
her prepaid is finished,
she mite be affecting someone else,
someone else mite be hooking her up,

someone also told me not to take it too seriously, but why should'nt i?
u can take it too seriously over someone and go crazy about him,
i envy that a lot, i want to be like that, to feel love, to embrace it again.
i"m sorry if that hurts you.

which leads me to another problem,
i keep thinking and worrying about how others feel towards my action, i must stop this and think about how i feel instead.

or maybe, maybe i'm just being crazy and worrying myself far too much of something which is not even a big deal.
'she has the decision, she holds it' - i agree, but i think i can do what ever it takes to make her decision be as close to what i want?

i'm giving it 12hours starting from 3.40pm, if there is no answer, i will go crazy and do something rash,stupid,bold but at least i can either end it or with a glint of hope, a flicker maybe? turn into something even deeper..

i am insane i am...

i hope this is one of those 'i can understand' post :D

2008-10-06T01:00:00.003+08:00

***note*** owner of blog mite already be dead due to someone murdering him.. when i mean someone i mean the person this post is too

HOLY CRAP I'M FUCKING GONNA GET KILLED BY HER FOR DOING THIS!!!! O_O!!

YES SAM!!! ITS U!! i'm gonna post a blog entry about U!!!! ARRRGHHHH!!!!!!!
:D

so yea Samantha!!!... i have no clue what to write about.. maybe a bio profile of her??

here goes..

Samantha age 17, single (lol)

ok.. dots.. sooo yea this is crap..

SAMANTHA!!! i really hope you understand this post cause i bloody don't lol... sooooooooooo.... can i stick to my old style please??

P.S : on the term of how we communicate, maybe i can give you an example when we meet up hehe XD

im soo fucking dead...

2008-10-03T22:02:00.002+08:00

Cry alone, I've gone away
No more nights, no more pain
I've gone alone, took all my strength
I've made the change,
I won't see you tonight

Sorrow, sank deep inside my blood
all the ones around me,
I cared for and loved

Building up inside of me
A place so dark, so cold, I had to set me free
Don't mourn for me, you're not the one to place the blame
As bottles called my name, I won't see you tonight

Sorrow, sank deep inside my blood
all the ones around me,
I cared for and most of all I loved
but I can't see myself that way
please don't forget me or cry while I'm away

So far away, I'm gone. Please don't follow me tonight.
And while I'm gone, everything, it will be alright.

No more breath inside
Essence left my heart tonight

Come back to me, this is un-conceivable
Breaking apart the ones you love
Hate runs deep for what you've done to us
Left alone through suicide...suicide

I just want to die, take away my life
lay by your side, please:.

Look at my face you pierce with a blank stare
No dream could prepare a heart for a lifeless friend.
she's gone. Nothing will take back time.
I need her back, but nothing will take back time.
take back time!!!

I can see just fine, you in my life,
there by my side as it starts to fade
I know this can't be right, stuck in a dream
a nightmare full of sorrow
full of pain

I look back and see the twisted road
Best friends and despair took its toll
Take away

You can't be replaced
I'm left alone with you
in spirit and the words
you wrote to me

Sorrow, sank deep inside my blood
all the ones around me, I cared for
and most of all I loved
but I can't see myself that way
please don't forget me
or cry while I'm away

2008-09-28T13:09:00.001+08:00

We keep writing, talking and planning, but everything's changing
We all know what to do but no one does it
Now this time has passed, and full of regret
Two in my heart have left me awhile, I stand alone
When they get back, it won't be the same
Never be the same

My life, you've always been there
Now you're gone, and my head's spinning
Left the childhood, left the memories, left the good times in the past
Moving on your time has run out
Wishing the clock would stand still, the world can wait
Wasting away once again, once lived as friends

Never will I forget you, and all the memories past,
So rarely I get to see your face.
Growing I looked to you in guidance,
We knew that time would kill us, but you're still so close to me.

To me you were my life,
To me you were my soul companion.
Now you are so far away,
Nothing can take away the times, and the memories we've had.

Come back, to the days when we were young,
Come back, to the days when nothing mattered,
To the days where nothing mattered.

As time passes by, regrets for the rest of my life
The ones who I confide were gone in the black of the night.

MY nightmare..

2008-09-27T00:29:00.002+08:00

Black enchanting eyes,
Cut through my heart
With no regret or sign of life
They tear apart my pride
And cold runs through my veins
I feel their stare from miles
Haunting every step
And they won't stop hunting me down
I know the time will come,
When all around me is burned
And you'll still see me there
Asking where you went too
And what person brought you here
And why you left the burning children
Cold out in the night
And calling for you all alone...

Dark in their hearts,
I can feel it burn inside of me
Tormented young with no soul, haunting me
Pain in their life all they know is misery
Take these chains away that are holding me down
Holding me down

They'll find you alone
Your desperate and villainous ways
Turning their hearts into stone
They seek more than vengeance
Look in their eyes, your pain is their satisfaction
Look in their eyes and see the darkness take hold
Burn.. for the rest of time!

Hear the haunting words
Lost children with no heart are crying
Turning there hearts into stone
And you're the lost mother they're calling
Go now, run and hide
I hear them crying at night
Outside when their planets are falling
They want to feel and know you hear them

MY im nt to sure what to say here...

2008-09-25T21:36:00.003+08:00

WARNING!!
: uninteresting post dont read, loads of spelling n grammatical error due to me being sick.. hmm achoo?? yea

OO AHH OOO AHHH... -.-

i just found out that i'm kind off a hypocrite of somesort..

oo its nt abt bashing ppl this is abt MUSIC. i will tell y i hate/like certain kind of music

yea, i told ppl i hate RAP/RNB etc.
nt cause im racist.. [im asian which is minority itself n even tat im a in a minority race with and even more minority culture, in a MINUTE country, lol... ill get to tat part later..]

so rap/rnb no way nono me hate it lots n lots buuuttttt!!! guess wat? i listen to NU METAL.. well u mite ask wats tat got to do for u nt liking rap/rnb?? well hmm get this quote :nu metal is a musical genre that emerged in the mid 1990s which fuses influences from grunge and alternative metal with funk music, HIP HOP and various heavy metal genres,such as groove metal and industrial metal.

see tat? up there in CAPITAL LETTERS, yea, hip hop.. bands like slipknot,system of a down,linkin park, limp bizkit, korn, etc. if u listen to their songs u can hear RAPPING in thm.. so yea i HATE RAP but i listen to METAL tat has rap in it but im ok with it.. (tat gotta change)

yea... confusing but yea...

MY SOLUTION TO THIS?? well i think ill give rap/rnb a chance this time round. though u have reasons nt to like them, mainly due to lyrical contents.

nw ppl mite say : i dont get wat u mean by LYRICAL CONTENT??
ok, an example wud be this song : ridin' by Chamillionare ft Krayzie bone
the lyrics to their songs are:

Police think they can see me lean
I'm tint so it ain't easy to be seen
When you see me ride by they can see the glean
And my shine on the deck and the TV screen
Ride with a new chick, she like hold up
Next to the playstation controller is a full clip and my pistola
Turn a jacker into a coma
Girl you ain't know, I'm crazy like Krayzie Bone
Just tryin to bone ain't tryin to have no babies
Rock clean itself so I pull in ladies
Laws of patrolling you know they hate me
Music turned all the way up until the maximum
I can speak for some niggas tryin to jack for some
But we packin somethin that we have and um will have a nigga locked up in the maximum
Security cell, I'm grippin oak
Music loud and tippin slow
Twist and twistin like hit this dough
Pull up from behind and is in his throat
Windows down gotta stop pollution
CDs change niggas like who is that producing?
This the Play-N-Skillz when we out and cruisin
Got warrants in every city except Houston but I'm still ain't losin

well tats just the first verse, n i can give loads of hmm comments just on tat. nw ull knw the reason being y i cant stand this kind of music..

first off there is obvius rascism in just the first 2 lines : i'm TINT so it ain't easy to be seen: nw see tat, he is sayin himself as black so well yea they cant see him due to the window being well BLACK, nw they bring in rascism to their song, dont blame us if we are saying since they alr are accepting it[dont get it well nvm]
'ride with a new CHICK, she like hold up'..'just tryin to bone ain't tryin to have no babies' every rap song there must have smth involving SEX, nw i knw y so many teens are getting pregnant cause they r pimping hoes u knw wat im saying?? they say the n word but other ppl cant?? thn whn we say the n word, woah, its ON?? like wtf? but i guess its the same for me though, i hate mats but i call ppl mats.. oooo ahhh. ok well u ppl just read the lyrics n u can sum up hw politicaly,ethnically,socially,culturely inappropriate..

but hey ive got nth against ppl listening to thm ok :D

another thing i hate is this n this involves metal/rock music

apperently ive notice tat only heavy,trash,black,death metal are the REAL metal music n that other subgenre are nt..

thn i got flamed on the net whn i say a7x is freaking hardcore n they go oh no they r f**s listen to so on n so forth cause they scream/play more hardcore...

n thn there is this thing tat i see :

a group of metal heads are talkin abt well yea metal. thn this guy comes in n say 'heard of nightwish?' n they go 'nightwish? wtf u listen to symphonic metal, ure gay , they r pop, listen to *insert 'hardcore' metal band*, n etc etc.'[i PG it to reasons of lazyness].. so yea u listen to metal but wow everyone's taste of metal is wrong n only urs is rite?

another things i can say i HATE metal is due to their stereotypical fans.. just cause u listen to metal, doesnt make ur balls any harder thn tat guy tat listens to pop, like huh? i listen to metal but u dont see me screaming 24/7 n acting all gruffy n having long hair.. im too freaking sickly to even be tat..

well rock is a totally diffrent thing..
rock is supposed to be like the only form of proper music for some ppl. but the way i see it, rock is the most fucked up genre due to it being misleaded by punk rock n emo rock..

punk is the most basic form of rock music, with the same drum beats, same bass beat n same guitar rifts, even the solo is the same.. thn they sing it like they are the most uber hardcore band ever been made whn all they are doing is singing out of tune..

emo rock isint really any diffrent but its smth tat made the trend of rockers.. if ure a teen thn u must be emo, thn if ure old thn u can be GUNs N Roses lol.. so as long as ure a rocker u have to be an emo.

lyrically speaking, punk/emo are kinds similar to rap/rnb with the only diffrence is tat its abt love.. but lets get this straight, whn a guy sings abt him nt giving a shit abt this girl n say UR LOVE IS A LIE n go all emo?? huh a guy bitching abt a girl? there is so many things which is by mother nature wrong in tat sentence.. so yea for those rockers out there simple plan/click five are the next GUNs N Roses

techno n trance.. hmm i dont have to really say much abt thm, computer edited songs which repeat the same thing over n over again with computer treble/bass n a computer edited vocalist singing which sounds like 2 chipmunks having butt sex thn whn the chorus comes, ORGASM time for the chipmunks.. ppl whu listen to techno/trance, dont even tell me this is music this is nt, its just edited computer sounds alrite?

but hey this is my opinion.. if u get offended so much by one person bashing over this thn hmm u got issues.. i have nth against all the ppl listening to this but yea i just wanna have my say.. (y am i talking like 1000ppl are reading this?)(beats me, n stop monologing urself)

BURP

MY wishlist :D

2008-09-23T22:35:00.005+08:00

woah, haven made a proper for a long time.. doubt i even made any at all -.- nevermind anyways, this post will be full of hmm my NEEDS AND WANTS AND SUCH!!! YESSS AHHHHHH....

well wanna know what is it that i've wanted??????? take a look at this

this is Zacky Vengeance of A7X fucking guitar!!!! its called the Schecter Vengeance Custom... which cost US$1099, not including shipment prices and such >< well here is another one

get a load of this people LOOK!!!!

this is Synyster Gates of A7X fucking guitar!!!! (lol) Schecter Synyster Custom :D this baby cost US$1399!!! X_X.. i want it soooo baddddd

hmmm, nevermind, ill get the normal ones but still unsure which to get, maybe the cheaper of the two so its Vengeance it is lol...

well here is another wish (hmm wants?? goals??) i wanna get for something else..
99 RANGE!! well for my runescape game, but maybe not that soon, kinda bored of it. mainly just go online to molest little 12 year old boys(girls) -.-

and another thing i wanna wish off!! GET MY FUCKING JOB!!! lol..

and another, GOOD EXAM RESULTS OMG I THINK I SCREW UP ALL MY PAPER DUE TO LAST MINUTE STUDYING(whatever that is)..

lets see what else i wanna wish, oo get a new tv, that godamn thing blew up today WTF..

(thinks)...

i wish to get laid.. not sure when, hopefully by next year.. (hint hint)-.-

i wish feeks will grow her assets ASAP so i can oogle at it when i go out with her. (YES BITCH I WISH I WISH!!!!)

did i say i wanna get laid? yea get laid, whatever...

wonder if hida is pissed at me calling her kakak O_o

wow i can talk alot... i mean type

OH YA I WISH TO BE IN A FREAKING BAND FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING RIGHT IN THIS FORSAKEN WORLD!!!! (i think ammy also wants that..)

i wish that the every player one tekken machine is fixed so i can play my steve -.-

i wish AZAZEL will stop rolling like a hmm ball... fuck..

hmm ok i wish for world peace.. not sure if there is war or not but yea..

i wish to publish my 6 part epic novel lol

i wish all my wish will come true..

i wish i have more to write but my brain is kinda jammed up

:D

PS : its AuelVengEanc3 now BITCHES!! well you know who you are, don't get insulted its not you but you, yes you not you though ok?

im a bloody dick aren't i? hell yea

MY treasure

2008-09-20T22:58:00.003+08:00

My story starts the day they said "she can't be found"
The news so dark, heart stopped, stood silent without a sound
Sorrow swallows my screams

Sitting in silence with heaven above me,
While I search for closure I feel it no longer

Staring at the carnage, praying that the sun will never rise.
Living another day in disguise.
These feelings can't be right, lend me your courage to stand up and fight, oh tonight.

Just for tonight,
Only you can be my guidance,
But you're no where to be found.
I miss you so.....

MY ... just put watever u wan..

2008-09-17T18:04:00.001+08:00

Jealousy's an ugly word, but you don't seem to care
Converse behind my back, but now I'm here
Need no one to comply with me though everyone that I defeat
Don"t need you, fuck camaraderie, this rage will never go away

You're on my back when the water gets too deep for you to breathe
A crutch for you that won't always be there
Hide in the dark another day
The fear in you is here to stay
So keep the fuck away from me and learn to trust the words I say

Hatred fuels my blood
I'll burn ya down (You can't help me)
One king to watch the horsemen fall
I'll fight 'til the end (I won't help you)
I can't trust anyone (Witness and see it in my eyes)
Now I can understand
Put faith in you for the last time
It's sorrow that feeds your lies

Running from me before I tear you down (Be afraid)
You chose the wrong side (It feels so right)
I won't help you, let you run away (Despise what you say)
Run towards the light exposing your soul (We won't be there by your side)
Salvation's dying (Somebody's crying)
We're all gone in the end
Sweet child we'll miss you
so far away, far away

I can't trust anyone (Witness and see it in my eyes)
Now I can understand (Put faith in you for the last time)
It's sorrow that feeds your lies

Falling away
Can't buy back time
Burn it down anyways

Yours...

2008-09-14T00:30:00.001+08:00

Your hazel-brown tint eyes watching every move I make.
And that feeling of doubt, it's erased.
I'll never feel alone again with you by my side.
You're the one, and in you I confide more.

And we have gone through good and bad times.
But your unconditional love was always on my mind.
You've been there from the start for me.
And your love's always been true as can be.

I give my heart to you.
I give my heart, cause nothing can compare in this world to you.

MY ... ❤

2008-09-11T21:56:00.002+08:00

We used to swim the same moonlight waters
Oceans away from the wakeful day

Scent of the sea before the waking of the world
Brings me to thee
Into the blue memory

A siren from the deep came to me
Sang my name my longing
Still I write my songs about that dream of mine
Worth everything I may ever be

Take me, cure me, kill me, bring me home
Every way, every day
I keep on watching us sleep

Because,

My fall will be for you
My love will be in you
If you be the one to cut me
I will bleed forever

My fall will be for you
My love will be in you
You were the one to cut me
So I`ll bleed forever

MY enigma

2008-09-10T00:39:00.002+08:00

Wake up
Grab a brush and put a little makeup
Hide the scars to fade away the shake up
Why'd you leave the keys up on the table?
Here you go create another fable

cause you wanted to

I don't think you trust,in my Self-righteous suicide,
I cry when angels deserve to die

In your eyes, forsaken me
In your thoughts, forsaken me
In your heart, forsaken me

MY roller-coaster ride

2008-09-09T01:22:00.003+08:00

my life's like tat, don't think so?.... some convincing then, maybe your life is similar too.. (WATEFUCKAMITYPING?!??)

roller coaster ride = helter skelter life = :S = X_X = me!!

maybe, this will help??

Somewhere life is good, and things go as they should
It's hard to find, but that's alright yeah
Searching for the way, push harder everyday
It's deep inside, that shining light yeah
But I'm scarred, by barriers placed in my path
I'm scathed

This ride that takes me through life
Leads me into darkness but emerges into light
No one can ever slow me down
I'll stay unbound

Sometimes when we're young, and always on the run
It gets so dark and I know that place yeah
So don't be too concerned, you've got a lot to learn
Well so do I and we've got plenty of time yeah
Don't fall off the track yet with so many races to go
Hold on

This ride that takes me through life
Leads me into darkness but emerges into light
No one can ever slow me down
I'll stay unbound

Some live so wrong, with what we do is each his own
But living in fear, endless shame for countless years
I never lived in fear I knew I'd die another day
I never viewed my life as something... slipping away

Some live so wrong, with what we do is each his own
But living in fear, endless shame for countless years
I never lived in fear I knew I'd die another day
I never viewed my life as something... slipping away

There's nothing here to take for granted
With each breath that we take
The hands of time strip youth from our bodies,
And we fade,
Memories remain,
As time goes on

There's nothing here to take for granted
With each breath that we take
The hands of time strip youth from our bodies,
And we fade,
Memories remain,
As time goes on

MY glimpse of light..

2008-09-06T14:15:00.001+08:00

ever have the feeling how it will feel to be dead??

Like walking into a dream, so unlike what you've seen
So unsure but it seems, ’cause we’ve been waiting for you
Fallen into this place, just giving you a small taste
Of your afterlife here so stay, you'll be back here soon anyway

I see a distant light, but girl this can't be right
Such a surreal place to see so how did this come to be
Arrived too early

And when I think of all the places I just don't belong
I've come to grips with life and realize this is going too far

I don't belong here, we gotta move on dear
Escape from this afterlife
’Cause this time I'm right to move on and on
Far away from here

A place of hope and no pain, perfect skies with no rain
Can leave this place but refrain, ’cause we've been waiting for you
Fallen into this place, just giving you a small taste
Of your afterlife here so stay, you'll be back here soon anyway

This peace on earth's not right (with my back against the wall)
No pain or sign of time (I’m much too young to fall)
So out of place don't wanna stay, I feel wrong and that's my sign
I've made up my mind

Give me your hand but realize I just wanna say goodbye
Please understand I have to leave and carry on my own life

I don't belong here, I gotta move on dear
escape from this afterlife
’Cause this time I'm right to move on and on,
far away from here

Got nothing against you and surely I'll miss you
This place full of peace and light, and I’d hope you might
Take me back inside when the time is right

Loved ones back home all crying ’cause they're already missing me
I pray by the grace of God that there's somebody listening
Give me a chance to be that person I wanna be
(I am unbroken; I’m choking on this ecstasy)
Oh Lord I'll try so hard but you gotta let go of me
(Unbreak me, unchain me, I need another chance to live)

I don't belong here, I gotta move on dear
escape from this afterlife
’Cause this time I'm right to move on and on,
far away from here

Got nothing against you and surely I'll miss you
This place full of peace and light, and I’d hope you might
Take me back inside when the time is right